When do you end a relationship?

Hi guys,

I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years already. The relationship is going good I guess you can say. We don't argue we don't fight. We get along. But for me the spark is gone. I don't see myself marrying him or having children with him anymore. there's no really a real reason as to why it all just happened. I feel horrible because I know he loves me and I know he will be sad. He's the very suffer alone type. We broke up once and he never even blinked when the relationship ended but when we got back together he said that he missed me so much but couldn't bring himself to act up on that so he let me go. But now I feel like I want to do more with my life I want to open up a business and have so many goals to accomplish and he seems to be just standing by the sidelines. No ambition...How do you know when its time to end it or if its just a bump in the road that you will over come together?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think that you should break up with him. You're hesitant to though, because it's a comfortable relationship. I understand. But you're not doing yourself or him any favors by staying in a relationship where you aren't happy. You could be off dating other people and finding a good match and he could be too.

    You said yourself:

    - The relationship is going good I guess you can say

    - We don't argue, we don't fight. We get along.

    - But for me the spark is gone.

    Have you tried getting the 'spark' back? Doing nice things for him and encouraging him to do nice things for you? Spontaneous weekend trips? Trying new things out behind closed doors?

    And have you communicated to him that you feel like your relationship isn't what you envisioned?

    If you have tried, and you're tired of trying, then sit him down and tell him you're done.

    Good luck.

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    • Yeah, many people just let it go instead of fixing it.

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    • I have tried to bring the spark back. I'm very spontaneous but he always has an excuse for something. No money.I have offered to pay he says no. I say lets take a stroll on the beach! He says no. I have tried sexy lingerie but the sex is rare maybe once a week and we spend the night everyday. I think what bothers me the most are the mood swings he gets...I don't say anything because they willblow over. He goes into silent treatment days. Even if I haven't done anything. I think I'm just tired of it.

    • The moodswings thing makes me think he may be depressed or have bipolar disorder but of course only a medical professional could make an actual diagnosis. But either way, it's not really your problem anymore. Your mind seems to be made up so it's best if you just break things off now.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • That spark will always fade!

    You seem to relish in that excitement and fresh feeling of new, romantic relationships when you barely know the other person, and together there's so much to learn, tell, see and do!

    But when all is said and done.. what now? No excitement! That sucks, damn!

    I don't know are you good or bad girlfriend material, but you definitely ain't good wife material.

    Know one thing: if longer you keep him hanging on - the more you make him to suffer, and yourself aswell.

    That spark is only the first phase. On the next phase it's not there!

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  • I've been in this situation before.

    You both are obviously very comfortable with each other. The normal thoughts that people have in situations like this are that if they let each other go, they won't find anyone else to be with. Like I said, I've been in this same place.

    It will hurt for a little period of time, but after that you will realize how much stronger you are. You also realize what you want in your next relationship. If you can't see yourself marrying him and having kids with him then end it as soon as you can.

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  • Well, you said it yourself. You can't see yourself with him in the future. If you don't want to be with him, that's an end of it.

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  • yeah the minute that spark goes, then the it's time to let go. It's just how the world goes.

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  • Break up with him but realize you're not getting any younger. If you pour yourself into your career you might run out of time to find Mr right.

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What Girls Said 0

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