How long does it take to 'grow apart'?

So my ex and I were together for awhile, and he had to spend the summer in California (I live in NY). we talked a lot and it was good but we fought a couple times. he ended up paying for me to fly out there and I lived with him at this apartment for a couple weeks. when he finally came home from Cali he had bought me a gorgeous silver bracelet that I loved. we were good for the rest of the summer, but then we went back to college. We go to the same school so we were only five minutes apart, but he still only hung out with me a couple times a week for 2-3 hours. we never went on dates and I would try to plan stuff but he always did everything last minute. It was almost like he was ALWAYS partying, and only hung out with me when it was 'convenient'. our communication was often sporadic and he would take forever to respond to me. Well we got in a couple fights because of this and yes I was kinda a bitch. then he ended up breaking up with me after the first week of school, and he acted all sad and started crying. said that he hated seeing me upset and that he wanted me to keep the bracelet and wanted to be friends,etc. so he asked if we could just date when December comes and he 'has time.' he also said we had 'grown apart' ... this sounded like bullsh*t to me, it seemed as though he was so obsessed with partying and his friends and I was too 'stressful'. He told me to text him whenever I wanted and that he didn't want me to take down pics of us on Facebook, etc. because he still cared.

Well I texted him once a week later just joking around because my football team beat his team. andd... no response. since I have seen more pics on Facebook of him partying and we haven't talked at all. What's his REAL deal? How can you grow apart from someone you LOVED within one week? Do you think he still thinks about me or will 'be sorry' and maybe want me back? this is just so hard, it was so outta the blue. honest thoughts please?


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What Guys Said 1

  • So, he goes out partying all the time having fun...

    Says he doesn't have time for you...

    Supposedly "loves" you (btw, you sure about that?) --yet doesn't want to be with you until December? How convenient for him, he gets all the benefits of being single, then wants all the benefits of being in a relationship with someone that actually loves him when and where he wants it.

    If he knows he has something you really want (ex. his company, or something else) he will always use that as a carrot on a stick, whether knowingly or unknowingly, he will use it to string you along while does whatever he wants. Do you not see?

    Of course you know this already...but there is something wrong with that picture, seriously. I think I've seen other questions from you about this same guy, and sincerely, I feel bad for you. You seem like a genuine girl just trying to make things work while your boyfriend f***s off to do whatever. I wish you the best and good luck with everything, stranger.

    • you have a good point. He tried to put the blame on me,but my roommates said the same thing, he wasn't really that good in the first place. I just want him to be thinking about me. I probably wouldn't take him back but I hope I'm a good enough person that he realizes what he missed out on. Somewhere down the road I want him to think to himself, "I f***ed up." if not, it just makes me feel like he never cared and that I mean nothing.. nonetheless, thanks for your honest answer.

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