sorry this is long but please here me out?
i don't know why but I've had this emotional connection to my ex for years now. the actual relationship had its good and bad parts like every other but I guess I only realized I loved her after I lost her. our friendship/acquaintanceship/whatever you call it after the breakup was very rocky too. she kept giving me mixed signals and then ignored me on and off.
worse yet she got into a relationship with someone else and then kissed me when she was drunk. so I really don't know what was going on with her. we decided to be civil with one another again after a massive falling out following the incident and now whenever we meet at parties and stuff she still acts like she has feelings for me (which I pretend to be oblivious to) but then she stays with her boyfriend at the end of the day.
i don't know what to do. I'm trying to let her go but I realized I really love her as its taken me 2 years to get over it and I get very jealous just thinking about the fact that I lost her to someone else. what frustrates me even more is the mixed signals from her.
Most Helpful Girl
you very much regret losing her obviously - but how did the break up happen? Was it something she wanted? If so, it was inevitable and could not be avoided.
I went through a very similar situation with a guy I had an emotional connection to for a few years, and similarly it ended up with a big falling out and things were very rocky with us for a long time. then we went our seperate ways and unfortunately we don't see each other or talk anymore (but I still think about him every day and miss him all the time).
You obviously have a lot of regrets about this and it's tearing you apart (believe me I know all about this). So here's all you can do; if you've not done this already, you must have a talk with her face to face, and tell her and explain things to her that you did which would have contributed to your problems and your rocky relationship. Tell her you regret things worked out this way and explain sincerely your actions. Then let it be. This is all you can do. If she lets you go after this - there is nothing further you can do. Trust me I know what I'm talking about in this senario. This will get things out of your system and you can walk away with your head held high. Be the bigger persona and face things head on.
If she doesn't follow your lead on this - then it is clear she doesn't not want the relationship and you must walk away.1