Does my coworker like me or is it all in my head? (detailed)

we've been working together for nearly 2 years. never thought twice about him until about 8 months ago. I went away on vacation for a week without telling anyone and when I got back, it was like a game of 20 questions. where did I go? who did I go with? what did I do? I was really surprised and thrown off by this because to be honest, I didn't think he cared. ever since, he's said and done things that make me wonder if he likes me or if this is some sort of game to kill time at work.

he likes giving me a hard time. any opportunity to get under my skin and irritate me in the slightest way he will take. first he would constantly brag to me about going to the movies. he's mentioned it to me on 10 different occasions. he told me once I don't watch any good movies. I though he was about to make a move & ask me out so I asked him nonchalantly once if it was his way of inviting me. he told me I couldn't go because my boyfriend wasn't around. he was referring to another coworker of mine. he constantly teased me about dating my other coworkers. I've never talked about my personal life in great detail so maybe this is his way of trying to find out if I'm single?

a bunch of us from work were planning a get together last year. at first I said I would go but he started getting on my nerves so I playfully said I was reconsidering going because he was being mean to me. then he started asking why and trying to convince me to go. he asked if I wanted to join him and his friends after work for a drink one time but he didn't know I was under 21.

I joke around about liking his friend who also works with us. I joke but I'm not sure if he thinks I'm serious about it. he laughs it off most of the time but then he seems annoyed other times. like I bring up the fact that his friend isn't there and he says, "wow, you miss him already?" and shakes his head. he would tease the 2 of us about getting together but 1) I am not really interested in his friend and 2) his friend already has a girlfriend.

before the new year, my coworker went away on vacation for a week. he was going somewhere tropical so I made a joke about him bringing back some sand. what does he do? brings me back sand and stops me on my way in to give it to me. I was so surprised caught off guard but it was really adorable and flattering so I hugged him to say thank you.

I accidentally messed up on something he was working on at work one time so he says I owe him a beer for that. he actually offered to buy me one first before then but denies it now. he is constantly bringing this up in front of me & other workers. we go back and forth a lot about who owes whom the first beer but he is convinced he's right. he brings this up all the time adding new developments about how him & his friends are gonna take me out. how he's gonna request the dj to play my least favorite song that gets on my nerves. he's always asking about when my birthday is & how long he has to wait for the beer I owe him.



Most Helpful Guy

  • He likes you - you're not crazy. As a guy, I think he's being obvious in his flirtation, but I understand that what is obvious to a guy is not obvious to a girl (and vice versa).

    Take him up on that beer you owe him. Ask him out. That way you have a ready made excuse (in the highly unlikely event that he is not that into you)

    • bringing back sand is a pretty obvious effort and conscious thought of you. he certainly does like you.

    • Show All
    • thank you. I really appreciate your honesty and you talking the time to answer. my only concern is that this is temporary or some kind of game. I don't want to fall for this guy (like I think I already am) and end up hurt. but then again... he wouldn't be so persistent in his comments, witty remarks, & gestures, right?

    • Exactly. It's not a game, but it is temporary in that if you DON'T respond eventually, he will give up.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • geez, this sounds just like my situation at work, been wondering about my coworker for over 3 years now, he's done the same subtle moves your guy has. Teases me. Compliments me. Hints around about I owe him something. massages my shoulders. Holds my hand. Hints around about doing something but never officially asks me to do anything. It gets really frustrating cause I don't know if he's joking or serious. But why would a guy do this for so long but never make a move? Why not just give up?

    I think in your situation he's brought up the beer thing quite often. I don't know why he just can't come out and ask you, but you might have to make the first move.