Is it wrong of me to ask him about his ex girlfriend?

So I have been with my new boyfriend for a couple months now. Everything is going wonderfully, except for the fact that I feel he is being shady about his ex girlfriend.

When we first started hanging out, he made a point of saying that he is super close with a girl he used to date, and they hang out all the time.

Based on simple deduction, I've discovered that his ex is his best friend sarah. He isn't close with any other girl, so it had to be her.

The thing that bothers me, is that he hangs out with her all the time, but never mentions when she is there. He has never even voiced to me the fact that he and her dated. I don't know how long ago, I don't know how serious they were, all I know is that SHE ended it with him.

Then, I was having a family party that I invited him to. I told him to bring a friend (I was hoping to set one of my girlfriends up with one of his guyfriends). And he was going to bring Sarah. I was so confused. Was he trying to make her jealous using me? She has a boyfriend by the way, so maybe he is trying to prove he can find someone else too? She ended up not being able to come, so he didn't bring anyone. it was weird.

Now, I am supposed to go to one of his family events on Friday. He said to me I should leave Saturday because he made plans to see sarah. I guess they Haven't hung out in a while, so "that is his priority on Saturday." I found it strange that he didn't invite me to come, or to meet her.

I just think its weird that he won't give me ANY details about their relationship other than the fact that they hang out frequently and that she was the reason it ended. Also, I've met all of his friends by now besides her. Why was she allowed to come to MY family party, but I can't hang out with them?

I don't know. I'm probably overreacting but it just seems weird. I don't like being left in the dark. he seems really into me and everything, I just can't help but be a tiny bit sketched out.


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What Guys Said 1

  • You really should ask him about Sarah. It seems that they are doing something shady which is disastrous to your relationship when it will be unmasked. It seems that he really likes her and makes her a priority over you. Something's really wrong about their relationship.


What Girls Said 2

  • You're not overreacting. He would have told you he is going to hang out with Sarah, or not gone to those parties and met her which he knew it will hurt you.

    Not only you're not his priority, but he does not respect you. I don't know if he is using you to get her back. Maybe he isn't doing so, but I wouldn't carry on if there is no respect. We can work out on many issues, but respect is the fundamental element in romantic relationship under all circumstances.

  • Friends are nice and all, but someone you've committed yourself to romantically should come first. He is not making you his 1st priority, and not only are you second, but you're second to another female. Not just any female, but his EX who left HIM. He most likely is still in love with her, and will stay her friend as long as he thinks he might get her back. If that means losing you to keep her as a friend, that's what he'll do. I'm doing some guessing hear, but I believe you do not have his heart, and you never will as long as she has it.


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