Is Relocation Really an Option I should consider?

Ok so... I met this really great guy and we have been dating for about 4 months now. Everything seems to be going wonderfully EXCEPT he lives in Montreal and I love in Toronto... I don't mind doing the long distance thing for now, but we are kind of concerned for the future.

He told me from the get go that he wasn't moving from Mtrl because his dad is ill and his family needs him there. Although I told him I loved Montreal, have family there and would be willing to move, I didn't realize until it got more serious and the potential of relocation was an actuality that it just doesn't make sense to move there.

You see, I just got my lawyer's license and since Quebec is the only civil law jurisdiction in the nation and they speak mostly french, it will be extremely challenging for me to practice there. I spent almost my entire life studying and I just don't want to learn french and write the Quebec bar exams to obtain my Quebec license. ALSO, he works for Bell and can easily be transfered here AND we will both get paid more here. Also, I am extremely close to my family as he is and I really don't want to leave them...

I know it's pretty early to be thinking about these things but I am almost 28 and he is turning 33. We really like each other and want to sort this all out now because we are in it for the potential long run. ( at least we hope so anyway). The move wouldn't happen until we got engaged probably not for another 2 years but he KEEPS bringing it up and pushing for me to guarantee that I will go there. He is traditional and keeps saying a woman should follow her husband wherever he needs to be. All I gotta say is I did not work as hard as I did to become a lawyer, just to end up a house wife.

SHould I just leave a great thing now because of the complications it's going to present? Or just take the risk and wait it out? Problem is we both don't want to waste time in a long distance for a long period of time at our ages to just end up breaking up because of this...plus it will be that much harder the longer we stay together...

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What Guys Said 1

  • You simply have to take the risk and wait it out.

    Or you can actually have a compromise to leave in-between Montreal and Toronto.

    This is really a hard decision to take since both of you wants to stay with your families.

    Though, if I were in your situation, I would rather choose to stay and Montreal and focus on my career. I can't waste my time having to take French classes and Quebec license just to be with that single man.

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What Girls Said 1

  • you should move to montreal for your own reasons. or not. and he should respect you for what you need and want to do with you life. likewise I'm assuming considering his personal circumstances. I think its great to meet someone who you like and are attracted to. its says a lot about your character and integrity in learning about what you want in life. but yeah that's a serious decision you're going to have to make and him too. I think being honest about that kind of decision will do you both better in the end. I would take my time on that one. I hope it all works out for you.

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