So I've been dating my boyfriend for 4 months. He's my first everything because I never had the time before starting college to date around. He's super supportive of me, my ambition when it comes to finishing school early and my career goals. The other night he asked me to move in with him, which would be amazing. I could easily afford the rent he and his roommates would charge me and they already agreed that I should move in. There are definitely more positives than possible negatives but if the negatives do happen they could negatively influence my future. Currently my dad is paying for me to go to college (guilt trip from never paying child support despite the fact that he makes bank). My mom is aware that we might move in soon and is willing to support me as best she can but is worried that my dad will quit helping to pay if I do.
Right now the best option I can think of would be to let my dad pay for my room and board in the college dorms again next year, but only keep only keep a few basic necessities there while I live at my boyfriend's. This would involve lying to him over the summer along with my brother who doesn't support premarital sex and certainly wouldn't lie to help me out. Since my mom and brother live only 20 minutes from us it should be easy enough to fool them over the summer with my mom's help. Another positive of keeping the dorm even though I won't be living there would be then next year if things go bad and we break up or I just need some alone time, I have my own place to go to.
Does this sound like a good possibility or just wishful thinking that will likely blow up in my face?
Most Helpful Guy
I would say its a bit soon. Having lived with many different people, you have to understand that living with someone is a completely different beast. There are all these other factors that now come into play that can really hurt a relationship if both people aren't already very committed and understanding of each other and their lifestyle.
However, I don't think its the end of the world. My main thing is that I think its only a really big mistake if one of the people is going to be dependent on the other. If you would otherwise have no place to live, if you need them to support you financially, if you share a car, if they drive you to work, etc. Things like this aren't good early on in a relationship because you'll be trapt if things go wrong. However, if you can work out an arrangement that is basically like an extended sleepover where at any point in time you can just pack up and go back home, then I don't see as much harm.
I've just seen too many instances of couples who moved in too early, all of a sudden started fighting, and now the girl is trapped in the relationship because without him, she's without any money and on the street because she made the mistake of being dependent on a Boyfriend she's only known for 6 months.0