NC with ex or be friends?

So he broke up wtih me a month and a half ago because he wasn't emotionally mature enough for a serious relationship. He said this relationship was different than his other ones because he liked me so much but he didn't want to be in a relationship now and didn't even know if he wanted one in high school. I asked him if we had any chance of getting back together and he said "I don't see a relationship for me in the foreseeable future but I don't know about the future." A week after we broke up, he hooked up with some slutty girls in Canada, which made me upset but I moved past it. When we first started dating, people would always tell me how I was out of his league but he made me happy so I ignored them. Right after the breakup he avoided me because he felt guilty and I gave him space but after a few weeks he started initiating contact with me everyday at school. I still like him but I don't want him to feel like he has that position of power over me where he can take me back when he wants. I'm friendly with him whenever he initiates contact with me and never initiate contact with him, but I want to be back to that position of not letting him control me and how I feel. I do hope for a reconciliation but I also want to let go of the past relationship in hopes that I can move forward. We eat lunch together because were in the same friend group so should I continue sticking around or go eat somewhere else and try NC? The only thing I worry about with no contact is that I don't want to push him away in hopes of starting completely over with him as friends and then reconnecting. Summers coming up and I'm afraid of losing him as he has only texted me once asking me a question about school so we Haven't gotten back to consistant texting yet. So if I want to start over with him, continue being friendly or give him more space than I have been (i.e not eating lunch with him, because I have to be in the same classes with him anyways)? Help:(

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Space! Give him space! Men always want what they cannot have. As long as it is easy for him to come back whenever he wants, as long as he's got easy access to you or if you're always around...he will feel like he can "deal" with you whenever he wants or when its convenient for him. So just do you and what makes you happy and if he really wants you or really care about you, he will MAKE you know it and he will WANT you to know it because he will not want to the possibility of losing you. Hope this helps. P.S. I'm not telling you this like I haven't been in your situation because I have and I really need to take my own advice!

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What Guys Said 2

  • You are young...move on...trust me when I say this--you will find someone better than him. Act like he's not even there if you are around him. Don't initiate, say hi and that's about it. I did write you a big lecture but I decided to condense it down...lol hope this gives you a little encouragement to move forward with your life ... ;)

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  • You should still initiate contact with him.

    He's still a friend of yours.

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