What do I do? Boyfriend's ex wrote on his ACTUAL wall..

So, I recently started dating this guy. I am so happy with everything and I'm really excited about what it could turn into. We've been going out about two and a half months now and a few weeks ago he took me home to his childhood home (about a 4 hour drive) to meet his parents and stay for spring break. I had a great time, but one thing that made me a little uneasy was that written above his closet door in big neon pink letters was "I love you more _____! xoxo, ____"

I commented on it and he said how his ex-girlfriend had written it and how (kinda funny but also depressing) his first girlfriend had written on his wall and then the last girlfriend wrote over it.. hence the "i love you MORE". I didn't really know how to feel about it, so I just kind of tried to forget it was there, which was a little hard seeing as when you laid in his bed it was a straight shot across the room. I don't want to make a big deal about it and don't really feel jealous.. I know we've both had past relationships. I just kind of don't want to have to see it on his wall. We are going back down there in August for a week to house-sit while his parents are on vacation. What do you think I should do? Ask him if we could maybe paint over it? I'm fine with that, but then our sexy vacation is in a painty room. He's going to be going down there for a dentist appointment this Sunday and Monday, but with all the driving and appointments I don't know if he'd really have a lot of time and I feel sort of bad asking him to do it.

Also, the other issue is that when he was younger he drew all over his walls and so some of it is art, which is sort of hard to ask him to paint over.. but I'm not sure if it would look funny to only paint part of the room.

Please tell me what you think! I'd really appreciate any advice. Thanks!


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would say if you were moving into his house and that was on the wall, then you could make a thing out of painting over it. But you are not moving in there- into HIS PARENTS' HOUSE- and so I really think you need to not seriously overstep yourself, which is what you will be doing if you bring up the paint thing. I mean, that's pretty f*cking ballsy, you know that?

    • You might be right. I don't know. I mean, I don't want to make him do anything, but I guess I see it as kinda the same thing as if my ex had written all over my wall & he was coming over. It's not the kind of memory that can be put away in a box. It's big and neon and written across from his bed, so I had to look at it while we were having sex. It isn't that different than having a big picture of her there. Ha. Granted he doesn't live there anymore, but we will be going for our 2nd visit.

    • It's his paren'ts house, and like you said, he doesn't even live there. But mostly, it's his *parents' house*. I'm probably closer to their ages than yours, and all I can do is put myself in their position and it would really piss me off proper if some little dude came into *my* home and proceeded to make decisions on what he finds there. It's just not your place to do that.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Get creative.

    Write your love on his body.


What Girls Said 1

  • What I think you should do is just simply write over it! :) put "I LOVE YOU THE MOST //or// TO INFINITY AND BEYOND, (his name) forever yours (Your name) and BOOM problem solved.. but don't have him repaint his room it's not that serious ;)

    • I love your idea. I actually joked about writing over it and he seemed enthused, even said he had a sharpie nearby, but something about the idea of being the third girl to write on that wall kind of depresses me, feels almost pathetic. I mean obviously the first two didn't work out. I don't want to end up just another silly girl that wrote on his wall. Do you think I'm just over-reacting/thinking it? Also we haven't said I love you or anything yet, so putting it on his wall might be weird. Ha.