Most Helpful Guy
It's his job to work through his own issues, please don't let him bring you down. I've seen lots of beautiful women start to be trapped by men with substance abuse problems. There comes a point in time where it's up to him to sort himself out, and after three years that time has definitely come. You can't do it for him, and you're not responsible for him.
Don't just wait around expecting for change. Some people never do. He's going to need time on his own to figure himself out. You deserve the opportunity to have a more functional and balanced relationship.