How do you forget an ex girlfriend quickly?

I caught my girlfriend cheating on me, and while I tried to forgive and forget she ended up cheating on me again with another guy. I never expected this of her and so even after breaking up I am still a little in shock about the whole thing. We dated for 3 years, and I gave her 3 months from the first time she cheated to the last time I caught her to sort herself out but she never did. I talked to her about it and gave her every opportunity to let me know if there was something wrong with our current relationship. She never talked about it, said she just wanted to forget about it and move on. Eventually I got sick of dealing with it and broke up with her.

We have been broken up for less than a week and she is already dating this other guy.

I never treated her so badly a day in my life, and only wanted the best for her, but based on her actions, even if she were to come crawling back I no longer want her to be a part of my life, past, present, or future.

Looking for advice on how to forget her or at least just stop thinking about her as much. I don't have any hope for a future between us, and frankly I don't want one again.

I don't hate her, but I hate her actions and how she handled this whole thing. She really put me through a lot of stress and anxiety instead of just being up front with me and telling me she was loosing interest., I could have handled that, but cheating, lying, disrespecting me, and walking all over me like I was nothing, that is eating away at me constantly.

Thanks for your answers.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Unfortunately she's too self-absorbed and immature at this point in her life to give you the kind of respect that you deserved. You didn't do anything wrong and I hope you don't let her ruin your impression of women in general. She's an example of a girl who is not ready for commitment.

    I can't promise you'll forget and get over her quickly, but I know what always helps me is to visualize all of the good stuff you have now that you're broken up. You no longer have to worry about what she's doing, no more anxiety, no more wasting time on a dead end relationship. You're free to do whatever you want, whenever you want. And you're also free to meet a girl 10X as a good...who lets you know how she's feeling and would never cheat on you.Those sound like great reasons to let this old chick go, and let her be someone else's problem. She'll be cheating on this new guy, too.

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What Girls Said 8

  • You sound a lot like my friend. He had been together with a girl for a few years, and she also ended up cheating on him. It broke his heart, and like you described it so well, it started eating away at him constantly too. She actually also got into a relationship with the guy she cheated with a few days after my friend broke up with her. It has soon been a year since their breakup, and he's still not fully over it. So, these things might take a lot of time, and there's not much you can do about it. Miles55 said "You should be fine in like 2- 3 weeks." which might not be true at all, especially considering how long you guys were together. Don't try to rush it and convince yourself that you're fine when you might not be. There's nothing wrong with letting your heart heal and taking your time to get over someone.

    Now, as for the things you can do to help the healing process. Reflecting on the situation is good, but try not to think about it constantly. This sounds very cliche but, surround yourself with the people you love and like, such as your friends and family. Hanging out with them a bit more often will help you get your mind off of things, which is good. You should also try to delete her from your life, like by deleting her from any social networking sites (if you haven't already done that), deleting her number, her messages etc. You can also delete any pictures of her/pictures you took together if you want to. However, you might regret deleting them later, so I suggest you hide them in some folder deep within your computer. Don't open it until you feel like you're 100% over her. After all, pictures are great memories, and it would be a shame to throw them away to realize later on that you actually wanted to keep them.

    Anyway. Starting a new hobby can help you get your mind off of things too. It doesn't have to involve taking classes/lessons or paying a bunch of money. For instance, you could try improving your cooking skills. Cooking helps you relax, and who doesn't like the taste of a great meal you made yourself? You could gather a bunch of your favorite recipes and put them in the same folder or something. Starting a little project like that might be more fun than you think!

    As I said, these things take time, so don't try to rush it. Also, try not to have a rebound girl. I know it's none of my business really, but having rebound girls only causes more drama that you don't need right now. Just focus on yourself now and what you want to do. Give it time, and take care of yourself! :)

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  • I think it's good that you don't want to go back to her. She sounds like a total douche. Just don't think about her.

    Ways to get over her quickly?

    1. When you think of her, remind yourself not to. Soon it will be habit and she will not be on your mind as much.

    2. Do NOT Facebook stalk her at all, it will only hurt more.

    3. Don't ask about her from friends or talk about her or her life, it will only make you think of her, leading to you not getting over her quickly.

    4. NO contact. Even if she contacts you, ignore it.

    5. Get yourself busy. Spend the time you spend thinking about her doing something else. Do a hobby, get really busy at work, start playing guitar, hang out with friends a lot more. Get yourself busy, because when you're sitting around or listening to sorta sad music you'll think about her, which will make moving on difficult.

    6. Like mention in the last one, don't listen to sad music haha

    7. Find someone else. Even if it's just a rebound, it will be really easy to invest time in another girl than your ex. Go out dating, have fun, and show your ex that you're not miserable without her, but a thousand times better without her.

    I remember when I was going through my breakup someone close to me gave me a quote that goes "Every exit is an entry somewhere." Just look at it as a new beginning and don't think about it, even if it may be hard. You know you deserve better, right? Just think about how much more you deserve than someone who betrays you and shows you they don't care about the effort you put into them. You should be with someone who would be disgusted by cheating and heartbroken in losing you as a boyfriend. Anyway, good luck. It takes at least a month to feel kind of yourself again. You'll just have to push through it, especially the days where it hurts, and remind yourself that you deserve better than what you had and that you'll find someone incredible one day.

    Good luck!

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  • just find yourself do what you always wanted to do you're free! like they say life is to short to be anything but happy. everything you wrote I went through too, but thanks to a good blunt friend of mine I learned that being lonely isn't bad at all, and yea think about the memories cry if you need to just get it all out of your system and start driving your own life. after my breakup I did become shallow for a while and tried "messing around" but I hated it and knew it wasn't for me that's when I decided to become selfish and started loving myself, I learned so much of me and my passion, I just kept my heart open through it all and kept myself very hopeful that the right one will come and yea I took a lot of punches on the way but it was worth it to really be able to tell who is really a gentleman or who's a clown.

    keep your chin up it'll get better and I am a firm believer in karma she'll get a taste of her own medicine. For now just be selfish! its ok! and don't be afraid of being alone because that's when you learn the most, its hard at first but in time she'll be just another wandering thought. hope this helps ;)

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  • I can tell you a list of things you could and shouldn't do, but there's only one answer and you might not like it due to the fact that it's cliche - TIME! It's cliche because it's true in 85% of the times though I don't got a proof for this statistic but it's pretty much what happens, at least to me...

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  • You are too good for her, she is selfish. You are young. Do not settle! Take the advice of another woman here. You are hurt. but Time will heal. Stay busy! Get out there and ask the universe tosend you your match.

    All the best~ !

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  • Look you don't wanna end up with a girl who your going to worry about all your life. If she is cheating on you etc. Just move on. You will find someone who you deserve. It takes a while. If you just get your mind off her. Do things you like. Cut off from her. Meet new people. You should be fine in like 2- 3 weeks. Just don't let her mess with your head. You deserve better

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  • The only thing in the world is Time. Time time time time time. There is no other cure!

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  • Its only been less than a week, and she was a huge part of your life for 3 years. There's no immediate cure to moving on (except for maybe a brutal head injury where you end up with amnesia?--not recommended). You just have to wait it out and you will gradually think about her less and less.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Just remember that she is selfish... Cheating, dating a new guy shortly after you, has nothing to do with you... Sad to say it but its true. Don't dwell on her and what she is up to now.

    Best way to forget someone is to be a better person without them and forgive yourself and the person you were with while with them... This has changed you, it's up to you if it changes you for the better.

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