My ex boyfriend is back..what should I do?

ok not really an ex boyfriend more like an ex friends with benefits. I broke it off with him since I got feelings for him and want more but he's not willing to take things further.He let me go and wished me well. I'm so hurt and upset.A month later he texted me"I know you may not want to see me but if you want to have lunch together or so something I be down"

ok question: is it possible he changed? or he just wanna see if I changed my mind so he can get lucky again?

what should I do?
Updates:
thanks so much for everybody. s reply. I also think if he had changed his mind he would have said so.i still like him.and is it possible he will grow his feelings for me given time?

a bit more detail..we started off dating 5 months ago and during the time I realized he didn't treat me like a gf.and he admitted so. I stopped seeing him feeling I deserve more respect. and month later he connected me.

we reunited. he did improved (spend more time with me etc) but still not a serious relationship
so I brope it off again. and now he's back again?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • What should you do?

    Play your cards. Use game tactics to fish out what he truly wants from you. He may just want another round of asual sex. Or perhaps he'll spill his feelings out and reveal that he'd like you as a girlfriend.

    There may be issues he has that's preventing him from forming relationships with females. One of them being his 'player' mentality. He may have other girls besides you that he's gaming into bed with him, whether or not there is no relationship possibility with each girl.

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    • why doesn't he just have sex with other girls but has to come to me?

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What Guys Said 13

  • You should know that if he changed his mind about having feelings and wanting a real relationship with you, he'd have said so. This is him doing nothing more than hoping to re-establish a FWB relationship with you.

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    • Again, he's just after the "benefits". He still has no interest in a relationship, and since that's what you want, you should continue to have enough respect for yourself that you don't let him draw you back in, because he isn't going to change. Instead of wasting your time and energy on this guy, spend it looking for someone else, who wants the same things you want. You'll be much happier in the long run.

    • what about looking and keeping him at the same time?

    • Can you truly handle having sex with him and NOT getting emotionally involved? Because most people, women especially, tend to get emotionally attached when having sex, and that's going to prevent you from being open to finding someone else, not to mention that other guys may not want to date you if you are FWB with someone already.

      I don't think this guy will be interested in just being friends, and even if so, you still have the problem of emotional entanglement.

  • just set the boundaries of what you want from him. Be straight forward with him before the lunch date. People do change and don't know what we have until we lose them so he may be thinking differently but only communication with him will tell you what you need to know and deserve !

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  • He just wants to hook up again. You have feelings, he doesn't. If you can handle these feelings being unrequited, then meet him. Otherwise, keep your distance.

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  • if he was willing to use you for a booty call for so long and openly admitted he didn't see you as a girlfriend then I have to say it sounds like he is just wanting to get in your pants again.

    tell him straight up that it's over and then you try to move on, cause a guy like that will just continue to hurt you.

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    • why would a guy keep a booty call relationship for so long instead of finding some other booty calls when the girl is done with it? I made it very clear already and he even said that hope I find someone I want. and now he wants to see me again

  • If you want him I would say, be as kinky and dirty as you can be and blow his mind. he is never going to want to leave your side if you do.

    If you no longer want him then there is no harm in being friends is there?

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  • Ehh, I dunno. He made it clear before he does not want anything serious. Speaking as a guy, some will say anything to get sex. Proceed with caution

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  • See whathe has to say. your the only one who would be able to truly determine if he has changed

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  • immediately escape

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  • Sounds like that guy is about to get lucky again!

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  • He just wants to have sex, nothing more.

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  • nothing

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  • Enjoy it and let it be and you will find out what he wants. Don't try too hard for anything.

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  • It's possible that this is your chance for him.

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What Girls Said 3

  • You should meet him for lunch and get a chance to catch up with him! There's nothing wrong with a free lunch and catching up with an old friend. During lunch spill the beans and get right down to the whole point of your guy's relationship status and see how it goes from there.

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  • If I were you I would ask him what he wants from you firstly. I would then see if it matches what you want. If he still doesn't want more then just a casual involvement then I would ditch the idea and move on. I know it's not easy when you like someone but life is just too precious to wait around for people who hold you back!

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  • Because he knows you have feelings for him he is acting as if he cares, forget him

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