How To Handle A Break With My Girlfriend?

We've been dating a good 8 months with little "break ups" here or there. It's long distance too.

So my girlfriend says she wants a break. She's been stressed with her new job its her first job and she's already working 40 hours a week. I work at night so when she's home I'm not its just a mess. Anyway she said she just wants to relax at home and hang out with her friends without having to worry about calling me and letting me know where she is all the time. She says I call too much, its never been a problem before, but when it wasn't a problem she didn't have to work all the time. And I know I can be a bit much at times so I understand where she's coming from. This all was led up to two days ago when I didn't say I loved her on the phone after she said it on purpose cause I was mad at her. And she even was like " What no I love you?" and I just hung up. I think that was the straw that broke the camels back on top of her being stressed with everything already. She hasn't said I love you when I said it. But I know its just a formality of the break up she doesn't say it unless were officially dating that's just how she is. And when we were dating and she didn't say it she was either still mad at me from not saying when she did, or the stress or both.

So were currently taking a break. What I want to know is how can I handle this "break time" best to my advantage to make her want me back even if its stressful or make it so she misses me. The no contact rule is a given. But when she calls me I want to know what I should say, to make her miss what we had and make it seem like she's missing and opportunity aka 'me'.

How should I smartly handle this to win her back?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • This is so familiar to me because I can just imagine you in the position of my friend's boyfriend. She clearly loves him, as your girlfriend seems like she loves you too, but she became this busy woman all of a sudden who needed to find a way to balance her work, school, family, boyfriend, friends, and self. You can understand when it's all laid out how suffocating some of those things can be and why she needs her space. My friend complains about not having enough space from her boyfriend, but at the same time she understands that she is not an easy person to be with, and she knows that she owes a great deal of her success due to how understanding and supportive her boyfriend has been. I know this may sound counter productive, but what he actually did during their break(s) is not give up on their relationship. He still contacted her and let her know that he loved her very much and that he was not happy without her in his life. I've seen this work another time with another couple and they are still together. Just be honest and up front, no tricks or anything.

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    • would you mind analyzing this? confused. I texted her yesterday since a couple days:

      I called her no answer.Then I texted her.

      Me: You busy?

      Her: Obviously

      Me: Oh okay you never answered my question last night were on good terms right?

      Her: Does it matter. I'm busy . Don't text back

      Me: You aren't mad at me are you?

      Her: No I am Stop F***ing txting me

      Me: Wow alright. It won't be a problem anymore. Goodbye.

      Her: I was eating dinner with my family so stop. Now I'm with friends leave me alone.

    • Wow she's kind of mean. I just looked at your age and this makes the situation totally different. I think she is still young and wants to break free from relationships.She's very cold and uncaring in her texts to you. You really do need to give her her space and move on.

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What Girls Said 1

  • You need to be supportive of her. When and if she calls, ask how she's been doing, what she's done lately. But ask in a curious, friendly way... not a WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING BEHIND MY BACK. She probably just feels pressured by you and wants to not feel that way anymore. Plus the distance can't make it easy. I dated my husband online for quite a while, and it's rough being apart, harder when you have disputes. If you just act supportive of her, cheerful when she talks to you, you'll become a GOOD thing, not something she wants to unload.

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    • would you mind analyzing this? confused. I texted her yesterday since a couple days:

      I called her no answer.Then I texted her.

      Me: You busy?

      Her: Obviously

      Me: Oh okay you never answered my question last night were on good terms right?

      Her: Does it matter. I'm busy . Don't text back

      Me: You aren't mad at me are you?

      Her: No I am Stop F***ing txting me

      Me: Wow alright. It won't be a problem anymore. Goodbye.

      Her: I was eating dinner with my family so stop. Now I'm with friends leave me alone.

    • She's done... a girl doesn't treat a guy like that unless she wants him to f*** off. I'm sorry, dude. Maybe the distance was just too much, and she doesn't remember why she cared to begin with. But for whatever reason she has, she is most definitely done and wants to move on, and is trying to force you to do the same. Wow, what a bitch... you don't need that kind of girl, dude. Find yourself a nicer girl.

What Guys Said 1

  • Just give her time.

    Send daily messages to her. Also, be encouraging.

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