Should I wait on him?

A couple of months ago I met a guy on and we hit it off real well. I learned that he got out of a four year relationship about a year ago. I was kind of doubting in the beginning before I actually met him. When I met him we hit it off great. He initiated a kiss and we both felt the chemistry there (strong). We like talking to each other. He just got this job that he told me would be great to have to carry a family. Yea he was already telling me his plans for the future. He told his bro and sis about me even. He is also a teacher but he does not stop working that job until 5/16. Well after he invited me over to his place to watch a movie a couple week or 3 ago (we still have not been intimate-good thing:) he started acting distant. It might have a little to do with me being so flirty and he probably go the impression that I want a serious relationship. He told me he had a good time and wanted to see me again in few days but he never called. I didn't make a big deal and continued to do me. I want a relationship but I don't know if it will be him. I like to go with the flow. Anyway, I initiated a few get togethers just to see where his mind was at (get attention). He responded by texting and saying that he just been spending time with friends and that he knows I want a relationship and his mind is not on that. He then told me that he is working two jobs and he want to get to know me. He want to get together after the 16th. I text him back that I wanted to talk to him over the phone about it and that I was only trying to be supportive as a friend and get to know him. I think he realized he got it wrong. I went a few days without texting him and sent him a pic. He responded by sending me a pic back and asking how I was doing? I think he want to see me now that he knows what I want but he doesn't want to because he feels like a fool. He said the 16th and I think maybe he is just waiting after. I want to initiate a get together (walk at the lake) so that we can get our strong communication back. Any ideas? I feel that if we wait any longer it is going to be awkward. by the way I text him yesterday about OKC game and he seem to be interested in texting back but stopped after I told him that me and my friends were watching at Baker street. He knew I was getting out but I realized that Baker street is a place where men and women go to have fun and meet people. I was just there to have fun. I'm sure he is not jealous but you never know. Any ideas on what or how I can ask about meeting up without seeming too desperate or clingy?


Most Helpful Guy

  • He could be busy, or he could be scared off with all your relationship vibes. Most woman aren't displaying that they're only interested in a long term relationship so soon without allowing the guy to have some fun. That doesn't mean sex necessarily but I would personally be scared off if a woman showed such strong feelings so soon. He's probably keeping his distance so he doesn't hurt you later on, not looking for a serious thing right now.

    He's single and wants fun, not worrying about commitments. The only way to get him interested again would be offering physical interactions, as it appears you were 'flirty' and I'm guessing that means you didn't let him get physical past just a kiss.

    If you can't do that, I wouldn't wait.


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What Guys Said 1

  • He may have met someone else and is conflicted because he knows you want it to lead into something permanent and dating more than one woman at a time is a tightrope. He doesn't want to hurt you while he is doing his selecting. That's my guess anyway. I would go with the flow. Try to separate your intimate feelings and really get your head into a place of just dating. Just dating...If it is meant to be, it will happen organically. Good luck!

    • Thats crazy. That is what he told me. That he like things to happen organically. He knows that I don't want to rush things. I just think things are awkward now. I am trying to break that. I want to text him but I am trying to think of something good to start a convo. He likes good convo.

What Girls Said 1

  • hmm, with me, my advice to the girls about this kind of this is just to make sure he misses you a little. If you always initiate get togethers, and he subconsciously and genuinely likes it, and you suddenly stop, you will be on his mind because he will wonder why you stopped! To be honest with you, a lot of guys that I talk to, and from experience, I can tell you that if you pursue him too much, he will flee. Not to say you should play games or pretend to be aloof, but genuinely just do you! just let it be, and he will come back. If not, he obviously didn't like you that much, don't assume that he said this and about the future that it means anything, like anything. Some guy casually told me he wanted kids one day on a first date - but that doesn't mean he wants to marry me and have kids does it? For guys, more than anythings, actions are so much louder than words. He can tell you he wants to be serious, but if he's not making an effort, enough said. Guys are like girls sometimes too! If you are on his mind, he will not be able to resist texting you. has a million options if this one does not work out! I think you deserve someone who gives you as much attention as you give him :)


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