In this story I will replace my boyfriend's original name with CB.
CB and I said some bad things to each other (sexually) over private messaging on Facebook...
his parents found it and now they want the relationship to be over. the very next day I got a call from CB telling me to go and pick him up so he could talk to my parents about moving in with me because his parents were going to make him choose between me and them.
after speaking to my parents CB was certain that he was going to move out of his house and move in with me. but he needed to go home that night and speak to his parents once more before moving out. he was planning on moving out on either the 14th or the 15th
so I drove CB home (this happened on the 13th)
and I apologized to his parents on what had happened and they forgave me, but his mother still didn't want me to be with her son. CB spoke to them and told them he was leaving so he could live with me. they made me leave the room and they spoke for almost an hour. CB would come out for a few minutes every twenty minutes or so and tell me what they said. he told me that they wanted him to stay away from me for a week and a half and then they might let him see me again.
I told CB they are just trying to make him forget about me and make him leave me by keeping him away from me and he agreed, but he was taking forever to make up his mind
so his father got angry and told me to leave and told CB to go inside. So I left without him
I had to call him the next day to ask him what was going on because I was planning on moving him in with me.
he told me he was staying home for a few days (while he was clearly in tears and crying) to give his parents a chance.
That night my dad called his parents and they ended up telling us the real reason that his mom didn't like me
she said she doesn't like me because I am disrespectful to her and she doesn't like the way I treat her son. anyways, my dad convinced them to give me another chance and to come up with a plan where they would help make this relationship work. they told him they will get back to him with a plan, and we most likely won't hear about it until a week and a half later.
I haven't spoken to CB at all today. yesterday was our one year anniversary and we spoke on the phone for 5 minutes. that's all.
now I've decided to give it to God because its killing me not being able to do anything about it
as far as her calling me disrespectful and saying she doesn't like the way I treat her son... apparently I roll my eyes at her? Or something like that. and she says I walk all over CB, I suppose she means I tell him what to do and stuff, but she's never around me enough to know that I don't do that. and if I do tell CB what to do its because he asked me what to do and refuses to make a decision. he's not very decisive
So... I have three options. If you were in this situation, what would you decide to do?
- Tell boyfriend to pick me or his mother, and if he picks me have him move out and live with me.
- Be nice, polite, kind, and whatever else it takes, to his mother to make the relationship work between me and his family.
- Break up with him until this problem with his family is fixed, and later on down the road when it is fixed maybe give him another chance depending on the circumstance.
- First do option B, and if that doesn't work do option A.
- First do option B, and if that doesn't work do option C.
Most Helpful Guy
Sounds like the mother's an overprotective bitch lol. Someone should tell her to let her boy grow up already. Seriously, someone should tell her that not every girl is trying to steal her little boy from him and that he can't be expected to f*** his mother and bring them grand kids.
But in this case it's not a good idea to make him choose. And do you SERIOUSLY doubt your boyfriend's love for you that he'd forget you in a mere week? lol I'd say go with B, try and agree he should listen to them and try to make amends and show you're a good girl and it was just harmless playing on the text and nothing much. I do wonder why they think you've been rude though. It sounds like she's making sh*t up because she can't let her son go and that should probably be something he brings up with her because it's really pathetic of her. I mean, you're both over 18 already ya? Tell her she needs to let him grow up or he'll never find a place in the world and be happy.
If nothing improves, dump him and tell him he needs to grow a spine and stand up against her better and if it really does come to it where he leaves his house and it's OK for him to move in with you, well, that might be an OK option.
But, you've only been going out a year. You both still have a lot to learn about each other and likely a lot of growing to do. Who knows if in a year more or a few years you'll still be right for each other. So it's something you got to consider.