So my ex broke up with me a little over a couple months ago, because he wasn't ready for a serious relationship and didn't want to be in one but still liked me a lot. He rebounded and hooked up with a couple girls a week after we broke up. During our relationship he would be so sweet sometimes but other times he would just be plain rude, like he would ask me about something and then he would be like "just kidding I don't care" and then he would flirt with other girls, and I would confront him about it and he would say you are so like an immature middle schooler. He would always talk about other girls and how they were all over him. It made me just not want to talk to him in the last month of our relationship which I think kinda caused our break up. I did like him a lot though because he was really sweet at times...It was my first relationship so I don't know if they are supposed to be like this or what and I'm having lots of trouble getting over him. A lot of people think he can be a jerk but its only because he's really insecure so he lashes out at people when they critique him. I'm in high school and I'm wondering if there will be someone better out there for me? Although he used to like my personality, he always randomly comes up to me and is so rude and nitpicky about everything I do! His friend told me that my ex wants me but I'm not sure if he's worth it because I'm starting not to like who he is as a person. And to make things more confusing, he will sometimes talk to me and be really nice and sweet. He is known as sort of someone who just goes from girl to girl but I was his longest relationship and most serious one. He doesn't like another girl at the moment but he decided to loudly let his friend know who I was talking to, that he has been on multiple dates. I want to be with him but I don't know how, and I don't know if there's anyone else out there for me because he was the first guy to actually pursue a relationship with me.. Help?
Most Helpful Guy
There is an old song that says "the first cut is the deepest". I can only imagine what you are going through.
Time heals all wounds and in time you'll look back on this guy as the immature jerk that he is. He was treating you badly, cutting you down by talking about all the interest he had from other girls. he was trying to make you feel less secure in yourself - a dirty nasty little control game if I've ever seen it.
Although I imagine you don't feel like dating now, when you start feeling more that way here is my advice for not getting hurt again - don't give anyone the chance. Date a lot of guys but not the same one more than once consecutively. Have fun, enjoy your time, and then at some point you may find a guy that is worth your attention, but there is no rush on that. Finish school and consider college, then when you have your own life you can start getting serious about guys but don't be like so many of these poor girls that get treated like dirt, just keep moving and you'll know when it's time to stop and settle down.
Here's something I heard one time that I sincerely believe: no guy under 20 really loves any woman other than his mother. They could pass a lie detector test, but its only the hormones that are talking. When it comes to settling down and being with one woman for the rest of their life, they are simply not ready. You may be, but guys don't mature as quickly as women, especially emotionally.
Make dating fun, don't let some idiot tie you down and treat you that way ever again. Don't put up with control/jealousy/abuse games even once.0