What is your craziest breakup story?

I had a guy initiate a break up, then I agreed to end it and then ALL HELL BROKE LOSE! it was like he went through seven levels of crazy. lol first he tried telling me he was going to kill himself, then he tried to make me jealous by lying saying he cheated on me, and then after a 2 and a half hour break up, he pretends to shake out of a trance, back into reality where he doesn't know what's going on or why I'm talking about breaking up for. claiming that he hit his head and the medication he was taking makes him lose large portions of his day and say things he doesn't mean. At this point I laughed so hard because I never knew he was crazy until we broke up! And because it was his idea to break up and then he put on such theatrics I couldn't hold back my laughter and I didn't feel bad about it. what are some of you weirdest/craziest/funniest breakup stories?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, my ex DID cheat on me, that's a large part of why I dumped her, among many many other reasons. She was insanely jealous. That didn't change after the breakup. She got crazy jealous and accused me of cheating, or that there was someone else. She claimed she was going to kill herself, and from what I recall, she tried, by swallowing a ton of pills. She got her friends to call me up, all the time, and give me all kinds of shit saying "how dare you." for breaking up with her, defending her honor, telling them lies. One time (a couple months after the breakup) she heard about me getting with someone else, and the next thing I know she's sent some thugs after me. This is the BIG ex for me, and yeah, she was crazy as hell.

    I've had another girl break up with me, and then call the cops, saying I'm stalking her. Kinda shut her down, considering there's be proof and witnesses contradicting her statements. (Oh and I'm not talking Facebook stalking, this was before the big Facebook, and to this day I STILL don't use Facebook, or pretty much ANY social network)

    Blarg... I could go on about all the crazy girls I've had troubles with. All the ways they would utterly try to screw me (and not in a literal sense) anytime I broke up with them, or stood up for myself, or even the girls I just simply rejected. Man, some of these stories would astonish you about on par with my first one. Seriously, it's happened to me so many times, for a while there, I was starting to feel pretty misogynistic, and ready to declare all women as crazy batshit fucking loco, and give up.

    I think the stories I've given so far are enough. I think if I keep going on, it will only make me look like I'm telling big-fish tales or something. (I'm not, by the way.) So rather than go on about it, I'll end it here. Besides, why dwell on the past. I have a good woman now, who defies all cynicism. We're deliriously happy, and have been together for years now. Better to focus on that. If anything good about the crazy women of my past can be said, it's that I appreciate a good woman all the more.

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What Guys Said 4

  • When my date was interrupted by an older sister...who dragged my date screamng out of the cafe, because she was supposed to be grounded. It made for a lot of gossip for weeks afterwards.

    Then she was REALLY grounded, so we had to break up!

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  • Lmfao sounds like a funny guy. Ummm mine are just like lame, standard non-eventful, nothing crazy ever happened.

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  • We broke up just because of assembling an Ikea.

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  • Hahahahaha I lol'd at your story. I thought to myself in sarcasm "Ah, the good ol' brain trauma trick huh?" lol.

    Mine is kind of scumbag-y. Broke up with a girl, her sister apparently had a thing for me the whole time, and ending up messing with her little sister and her friend while they were having a sleepover thing.

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    • haha yeah I couldn't believe he was trying to pull that. lol it cracked my sh*t up! wow yeah, that was a bit scumbag-y, but its the past now. lol

What Girls Said 4

  • My ex told me he was gay a month after he broke up with me and right after he said, and I quote, "by the way, I'm gay" he learned in to kiss me with puckered lips...

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  • I was a little bit drunk,I hooked up with one guy,and tomorrow I told him it was a mistake and that we should forget about it.He sad that it was OK and I thought that was it.Few days later he started calling me and sending me messages telling me that he loves me and want to be with me.I told him to go f*** himself and to leave me alone.It was 2 months ago and it didn't stop.Every time I'm coming back from school I can just see him standing on his balcony watching me.What a creep.I don't drink that much anymore.

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  • My ex told me I wasn't allowed to speak to other guys. I told him to watch me. Then I saw him cheating on my with someone else so I confronted him about it. He grabbed my neck and lifted me off the ground. So I slammed my palm into his nose and he dropped me. Not sure if it broke or whatever. So...that's my break up story.

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    • Wow what a jerk? He cheated on you but tried to keep you in control?! Good to know you smacked him.

    • Yeah, I may be small, but I can be hard to handle :)

  • i left my ex without saying goodbye. He was a great guy, but then when he gets angry. he becomes this scary beast. every time I wanted to leave him, he would get a knife and cut himself. I felt so bad for him, but at the same time I felt trapped and couldn't tell anyone about it. I knew my affection was going away, and I thought he knew that too. then, one day I woke up and I was naked and drunk. when I asked him what happend. he said we had sex and he knew I didn't want to have sex with him. I felt broken. I left his place and told my friend, who was his friend and was a guy called A. then A went to his place and beat him up. I changed my phone number. A was the only person who knew about this. even my parents didn't know.

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