Is it bad if ex girlfriend thinks you are dating again if you want her back?

My ex dumped me months ago because she said she never loved me. At the time, I tried hard to get her back, but she said no, but was willing to remain friends. I was not comfortable with this so I went NC for months.

Two and half months later, I saw her at an event and it was brief awkward, but friendly. A week or so after that, I saw her again, and it was friendly again. I did not know whether to interpret her cordiality as either her willingness to reconcile, or her wanting to be friends, as she stated during the breakup. Since I took her comments at face value and never received a call, text, or email from her, I decided to go out and date.

My ex found through mutual friends that I went on dates and socialized with female friends. This must have upset her because the next time I saw her a month later, my ex was completely cold and even rude to me. I am upset now because if I could not get her back, I at least would have been content that we could have remained civil and amicable with each other.

Now, I feel like I possible misread her signals when she was being friendly to me before.

Do women send subtle signals like this when they don't want to make it clear what their intentions are?

As a man, I normally would approach a woman and ask her out directly. But, in this case, my ex dumped me and only offered friendship when I tried to get her back.

Does she really have a reason to be upset? I hear she is not dating anyone. Could it be that she doesn't wasn't me back, but is jealous that I am bouncing back and that I didn't crawl back to her. She previously told me that ex boyfriends (even married ones) one call her back for hookups. She is attractive and is used to getting attention from guys.

Thanks for any advice/perspective.

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What Girls Said 2

  • just tell her you want her back.

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    • Thanks, but did you read my comment below? I would want her back, but I tried at the time of the breakup and she told me she never loved me, the whole relationship felt forced, blah blah.

      It would have been nice to at least keep things friendly, like they seemed for a bit, but oh well, it's just one of those sucky situations in life have to simply deal with.

      I will continue to be brief and friendly when I see her, even if she is cold. At least, I can say I took the high road.

  • You know, women who are confident and attractive can be really egocentric. They want their ex's to miss & want them back but they want someone new to like them at the same time. And when it comes to it they won't take you back. I think your ex is just being really egocentric. And you should get over her and move on. There are plenty of women out there.

    Also, you should know that if she didn't contact you at all after the break up, she is most definitely over you.

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    • Yes, thanks. The ex is both confident and attractive. There is nothing there left, so I guess I am glad I did not contact her after she was friendly to me the first time. I would have just probably feed her ego and she would have rejected me all over again. It just sucks that just we were being civil with each other, she went cold on me. If I chased her, she would get annoyed. If I don't chase her, she apparently doesn't like that either. Talk about lose-lose!

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