Why don't cheating husbands leave their wives?

If a guy is married but constantly looks for women to have affairs with, why wouldn't he just leave her and be single? Why stay with her if you want outside women?

1|1
1314

Most Helpful Girl

  • Because they ENJOY being laying cheating bastards, yet they hate being called that... They feel "offended"...

    Being honest has nothing to do with how expensive a divorce is, that's bullsh*t!

    Integrity is something that most people don't have... A person with integrity doesn't deceive others.. BESIDES 'most', men who cheat, don't even know they "want" a divorce, they decide that AFTER! So all this "divorce is expensive" bullsh*t excuse, is a pathetic attempt for justification! IT's not a reason.

    1|0
    0|0
    • *Lying* xD

    • Show All
    • I don't know.. but definitely a slut when she wants to be single to go out with friends.. She can do that while being in a relationship... people go out when their in relationships.. The ONLY reason why someone would want to be single to go out is to either flirt and date other people or because they're interested in someone! Therefore she's a slut!

    • Ignore the grammar please ! xD lksdjalsdfla iefalkfa lsdlkja

Recommended Questions

Loading...

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 14

  • There's a variety of reasons why the man won't leave his wife.

    1. It's bad timing. They're living together and there's no financial backup for him to leave the place yet.

    2. He still loves her and hopes that within time things will get better.

    3. He still has faith in his wife, and still remembers why he married her. There's good in her and wants to work things out to bring back out the best in her.

    4. He cheats on her in an effort to 'game' his wife to get her to love him again. When hubbie is cheating on wifey, wifey can't help but create drama in her head that will make her worry that she'll lose him. So it's a mechanism to get her to start working things out before he leaves for good.

    5. The kids. Stay together and make the sacrifice of a declining marriage to benefit the children in hopes that they grow up normal and not dramatized. Children are the most vulnerable to tramatic events, which could potentially harm their future.

    And to the anonymous user who just blocked me - seriously girl you got issues with men. You're pretty sexist. I suggest you get help - there's no way a man will respect you if you have absolutely no respect for them.

    1|1
    3|1
  • I suppose it's different between marrying and dating.

    It usually comes about when the man's libido is much higher than the woman's, and therefore one woman is not enough for him sexually. So he looks elsewhere for other partners to sleep with when the wife doesn't show much interest.

    Actually, remove the gender pronouns from that last paragraph. The same thing happens with women who have higher libidos than their husbands.

    But the fact is that he's not cheating because he doesn't love his wife. He's cheating because his sexual desires aren't being met, but that the marriage is still more important than his sexual desires, so he tries to find a workaround.

    According to Christopher Ryan, humans were naturally built to have lots of sex between all the members of the tribe, non-monogamously. Women preferred different men at different times, but had a constant libido overall. Men had a constant libido as well, but his choice was more broad, and based on the overall health of the tribe.

    Is what happened when society chose monogamy (after the advent of agriculture), is that if a woman is to stick with one guy, she would normally sleep with the funniest guy, or the strongest, or the tallest. But when she chooses one guy for the long term, he has to be the strongest, the funniest, AND the tallest in order for her to be constantly interested.

    At the same time, the guy's libido hasn't changed. So he is interested for the full time, and she's only interested, like, half the time. And that creates the sexual tension.

    Sometimes women will cheat if they aren't interested in their guy at the time, but are much more strongly attracted to another type of guy.

    Remember that this is an explanation, not an excuse.

    If you agreed not to exclusivity, you should both respect that agreement. The point is that it won't be easy. And the other point is that you have to evaluate the importance of the marriage over the significance of the cheating. If handled properly, cheating doesn't have to destroy relationships.

    Here's the full video:

    link

    0|1
    1|0
  • Because divorce is too damn expensive and can possibly ruin his reputation depending on the job/career he's in.

    Blame the past history of women and the courts for completely screwing men out of their money and assets. If the past women weren't so greedy with divorce, more men would do a "clean divorce" and THEN pursue other women.

    1|1
    4|0
  • Because eventually, the cheating husbands will get older, and it will be harder to find someone to cheat with...

    0|0
    0|0
  • Same reason cheating wives don't leave their husbands.

    0|2
    2|0
  • Why does the man have to be the cheater in your example? Women have affairs just as much as men do and you have sexist implications if you think otherwise. And both have the same reasons why they don't divorce:

    -Children, maybe there is no love for each other anymore but the children don't deserve the divorce.

    -Money, a lot of marriages aren't prenuptial so someone could lose a lot of money. Plus lawyer fees and such.

    -Love, there are people who love the person they're married to, but can't resist temptation.

    -Career, if he is like a well known politician or any known in general to the public, it could hurt career.

    -Broke, maybe the wife/husband is unemployed or cannot support oneself without the spouse

    -Mid-life crisis

    1|0
    1|0
  • Because he likes her enough to stay with her but not enough to stay that faithful. :)

    0|1
    1|0
  • It's costly to leave a wife, sweetheart! Even if she's treating you like sh*te!

    0|0
    0|0
  • you have no idea how expensive a divorce is do you? You can be stuck paying alimony as well

    0|1
    1|0
  • Umm, because it's too expensive to leave? lol Whereas staying together and "cheating" is free.

    1|0
    1|0
  • Not saying he's at all right in his actions, but what if he really loves his wife and she's the one he really wants to be with, but she's not giving enough in the relationship? He's going to want to fulfill those needs somehow.

    Again, not saying he's right for cheating, but women aren't always the best with give-and-take. Many will gladly take whatever they can get, but fail to reciprocate on the same level.

    0|0
    2|0
  • 1. Because divorce and supreme courts will ruin his life and make him bankrupt

    2. He stays with the wife because of the kids

    3. The wife has a lot of money and is his financial security incase he screws up

    4. The wife is a safety net when he realizes things won't work with the other women

    0|0
    0|0
  • The main reason is that the divorce courts will screw the guy over, though that's true even if the guy didn't cheat or do anything wrong. For example in the US 92% of alimony payments go to women even though 40% of working wives outearn their husbands.

    Other reasons. Staying together for the kids. Other general inconveniences of divorce. Not wanting to hurt the wife because he cares for her still in some way even though for whatever reason he feels the desire to have sex elsewhere. Not wanting to cause controversy (especially in more conservative communities). Other benefits of home life. Hoping the wife will leave first.

    0|0
    0|0
  • For a number of reasons. They might be afraid of losing money or custody. They might not want the embarrassment of a divorce. Or they might just think they can get away with it and have it all, kinda like those men that have harems in other countries. Mostly I think it is done out of selfishness, and the thrill that comes with knowing they are doing something wrong.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 12

  • Ok, I' ve read a lot of these comments - and people keep on saying stuff about sexual libito and what not, and that it is built into us genetically to want to sleep around. But I just wanted to point that out that this is not an excuse to cheat, for the simple reason that we are humans, and we can think, and therefore, we are responsible for our actions. Seriously, control yourselves.

    0|0
    0|1
  • 1) He probably has kids. A guy who is married with no kids is more likely to walk out than a guy who is married with kids.

    2) It will ruin his precious reputation.

    3) He likes having a stable life, but he also likes living on the edge, so to speak.

    4) Divorce, alimony, and child support are expensive.

    5) He could be relying on his wife's income. These days it's not uncommon to see a woman who makes more money than her husband. He could be used to a lifestyle that he can't afford on his own.

    6) The women he cheats with might also be married.

    3|1
    0|0
  • Why don't cheating husbands leave their wives?

    Most likely because divorces would ruin him thanks to patriarchy biting guys on their asses tends to translate gender roles like gals are the caregivers and guys are the providers into gals take the money/kids and guys pay for it.

    Why stay with her if you want outside women?

    Possibly because it seems to guys wanting others does not mean they don't want their partner. In my opinion guys generally want other gals besides their partner and if they can get such gals they will however it doesn't diminish their desire for the partner likely because gals are interchangeable to guys and sex is simply busting a nut in or on a gal so it holds no to little emotional investment.

    0|1
    0|1
  • I find the difference between a woman's view and a man's view on this subject fascinating.

    Anyway. Men who cheat on their wives are typically very selfish.

    I think some men may cheat if the wife has cheated on them. I also think that some women have no respect for themselves, thus they let their husband cheat, knowingly.

    Some men may use the excuse "because I'm not getting any from my wife", but seriously, why wouldn't you just rekindle the spark with your wife then? Because they want to have their cake and eat it, too.

    And lastly, I think sometimes men cheat because they "lose their love" for their wife, which brings me to the question, why did they even get married in the first place? Also, why not just leave her? Most likely selfish reasons.

    People take marriage too lightly nowadays, in my opinion. That's what it comes down to.

    2|0
    0|0
  • watch mad men link

    0|0
    0|0
  • Because he wants to have his cake and eat it. These types are very self indulged selfish people!

    2|0
    0|0
  • it can be anything:

    1.- maybe he knows how to handle his wife, so with his affairs he doesn't have the same responsabilities, the girls of the affairs won't demand as much as if they were in a formal relationship.

    2.- life would be more expensive, he won't have someobdy to divide the expenses with.

    3.- the wife could take more than half of what he owns. either by accusing him of cheating, or alimony

    4.- he feels he attracts girls by being married, or it might be a turn on for him.

    5.- if he has kids he might not want to have then just a few days a week

    6.- he might still "love" his wife, but wants more than one relationship.

    0|0
    1|0
  • Does his wife know? If she doesn't know, then he has no reason to leave. He feels secure in that relationship.

    0|0
    1|0
  • 'Cos it's too expensive to divorce.

    1|0
    1|0
  • I think it has to do with character. If a man or woman don't have boundaries/morals when it comes to sex, they will continue to do what they did as they did prior to being married. We all go through points in relationship when we may fancy someone else or have a peeked interest, however it's how we deal with those temptations. Do we allow it to fester in our minds or do we filter it as we are committed to another?

    I believe it's the same for both men and women. We can make the excuse of money, kids, crises,etc, but like anything, out core beliefs are what we act upon. There are probably people who have still had affairs despite the above examples. I really believe it's a heart issue as opposed to external factors..

    0|0
    0|0
  • Divorce is messy and expensive.

    0|1
    1|0
  • He usually just wants her for sex. Men that have affairs are shallow and pig headed.

    5|0
    0|1
    • The mistress he just wants for sex

    • Show All
    • Put out for your man so I don't have to :P

      For every restless husband there's a girl like me who loves the fact that his strings are all tied up and none left for me = all fun no mess.

    • @pheonix: right on. A lot of other guys said the same thing in my question link

Recommended myTakes

Loading...