How to stop being so controlling?

Could you recommend books or something?

I'm driving my boyfriend (possibly ex now as he won't talk to me and I don't know what's going on) into hating me.

I feel like I'm smothering him but of course I don't clue in when I'm doing it.

I try to control when he hangs out with his friends, how often he cleans his room, his diet, money, etc.

It's way out of hand

Can anyone relate and offer me tips to recognize when I'm doing it?

I don't want to wreck anything else for myself b

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Remember you are his girlfriend not his mother he needs to be able to make decisions himself and without getting lectured.

    Don't talk to him about these topics unless he brings them up first and is asking for your advice on them.

    If he wants to hang out with his friends let him! You should hang out with yours too!

    His diet and money are his business despite the fact that you are in a relationship., IF he gets into trouble money wise just make it known that you're not a bank and he needs to fix the financial issues himself.

    If he asks you where you want to go for dinner or what you'd like for dinner then give an answer to that but let him eat what he wants in regards to regular meals.

    With the whole bedroom thing I agree with you that it should be clean and if he's expecting you over he should make the effort to make sure the room is nice for you

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What Guys Said 1

  • This is certainly one of the biggest frustrations and turnoffs for men. Kudos to you for recognizing the problem and wanting to do something about it. Just being conscious of it and caring about not doing it puts you ahead of 90% of women.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I guess you need to stop yourself a little bit more each time, tone it down a little bit and then keep doing it until you act "normal"

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