Important question for me, I'm thinking about reconnecting?

Lately I just haven't been able to stop thinking about her. I haven't seen her in years, things didn't end well for us the first time, but that's what I feel so bad about. I was naive and a complete idiot. Over time I've calmed down but still live with regret over everything.

This girl and I are a lot alike in a few ways and it just pains me that we had to cease contact. We could be so much. Even if we couldn't be together I just want to at least be her acquaintance. I just don't know how she would react if I reached out to her again.

It was back in a time where I liked her way more than she liked me and things just went horribly, partially my fault. I just don't even know what to say. It would just be great if I could find a way to talk to her and clear my head. This is a really important question for me, and she's always been important to me for some reason. I just want to do the right thing. Should I try reaching out to her?

0|0
80

Most Helpful Girl

  • In your case I would not reconnect with her. (...and I have a lot of experience with reconnections!). I just sounds like trouble. You had strong feelings for her that she didn't reciprocate much of? What's to stop you from rekindling those feelings? What's to stop her from digging up the same negative feelings from before (if she has even gotten past it in the first place). In most cases when people rekindle a connection its just resurfaces old behaviors, attitudes, thoughts, etc. No matter how much you've both changed. Some of us have people that meant a lot to us, that we'll never forget (childhood friend for example), but just because our memory of them stays with us doesn't mean we have to go looking for them in our future. The past was the past, but its probably time to make some new memories with a fresh start. - good luck

    You know what they say about the definition of an insane person? :P

    0|0
    0|0
    • What do they say about an insane person? I'm not crazy, just crazy about her. I don't get it, for some reason it always seems that when you're crazy about someone they think you're just crazy in general but how often is that really true? Rarely, if ever.

    • Show All
    • Well, my feeling is you'd be taking a big risk. But ultimately only you know what's best for you. If you feel like you can't move on without trying...then you might as well give it a shot. We can't predict how she's going to react to prepair you for what ever response you get. So my only advice if you go through with it is to keep and open mind and limit expectations (...I mean for all you know she could be married with kids, a drug addict, or your soul mate). Good luck!

    • I know she's not the first two lol she's a good girl going to a good school. Thank you though, I'm just so scared ya know?

Recommended Questions

Loading...

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • Yeah, no point in continue living with regret. :) Make every moment counts. I was dating a guy and thought we are somewhat similar, I was going through a tough time and didn't disclose much of myself and we just fall apart. Things are getting better for me and he still trying to pick up his career and I stay in touch to encourage him. Who knows what you might say that change people life, you know? Even if we are acquaintances.

    0|0
    0|0
    • We had a bad falling out though, that's why I'm so wary about this.

    • Show All
    • Then do it and let us know how it goes. All I learn in life is sometime the only thing I can do is send my message and if they interpret it however they want. Live life well.

    • Ugh I'm just so scared. I don't know.

  • I say go for it. Be honest with her. Tell her you feel horrible about everything and that you miss her. Women just want to feel wanted. I went through something like this with an ex. I didn't realize he was reaching out to me because he cared. I thought he was just trying to gain some kind of control over me. Instead of telling me how he felt he approached me the wrong way. It wasn't until later that I found out he was in pain over the way things ended. At the time I couldn't care less. Now I wish I would have read between the lines. I wouldn't mind being his friend. He was good to me when we were dating. I even loved him. It just didn't work out. Just let her know how you honestly feel. Don't push her. Still give her space. But don't just give words. Use your actions. Make her feel safe and happy.good luck! :)

    0|0
    0|0
    • Safe and happy? Through a message?

      I'm not sure how, or if I will even do this, I'm so scared.

    • Show All
    • I want to apologize without sounding like a sap and also like I'm not just doing it for myself. I don't want to sound insecure or selfish. Truthfully I'm not so sure why I'm even apologizing. My emotions got away from me back then I suppose but I liked her that much. Now that I've calmed down a lot, I guess I just want to see how she's doing and just hope we can consider ourselves on better terms.

      Being on bad terms with someone is not something I've had to deal with and I hate it.

    • I think you need to figure out how you really feel before you talk to her. You could tell her exactly what you have told me but it won't matter unless you are sure of your emotions.

  • yes,try!

    0|0
    0|0
    • I am just afraid due to the way our initial friendship ended. It wasn't pretty. lol

      It just seems like a lot could have changed since then, and I think I can be ready to handle no matter what happens. It's just taking the plunge. That's the hard part.

  • just do it so you don't have any regrets!

    0|0
    0|0
    • That was my philosophy before when I tried to get closer with her, and I have grown to regret that too, how do I know that I wouldn't regret trying again?

  • you can try but if she didn't like you then what makes you think she'd change her mind?

    0|0
    0|0
    • We aren't in high school anymore for one. We will have had time to grow and mature. She used to date guys that were so wrong for her, it drove me nuts. If she would give them a chance over me then, why wouldn't she give me a chance now or sometime in the future?

  • i would definitely give it a go. show her how much you have changed.

    0|0
    0|0
    • What if she doesn't take my "olive branch" offer kindly?

  • yes go for it!

    0|0
    0|0
    • How would you personally react? I liked her back in the day way more than she liked me, and we complete cut contact on social networks and everything. I know that a lot of people and their ex's don't even do that. She even had me blocked for a while, then later seemed to have unblocked me, why? I have no idea. But it has been a long time since then. Somehow I'm still thinking about her. I can't stop.

What Guys Said 0

Be the first guy to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!

Recommended myTakes

Loading...