How can I move away?

I can't live with my family anymore. I can't live with my father. I can't take it. And I don't know how to get myself out. I am a high school graduate, but no college, and will not be attending college on my family's dime. I will not accept it. I want OUT.

The thing is, I'm at a loss of what to do... I've never lived by myself, and can't even begin to think where to start. I don't have a job, but am looking, and don't have a car. Is leaving even possible? If I do, can I really have no contact with them? When I can afford college, will the administration really need my parents to be connected to the funds, even though I would be having nothing to do with them?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I know how you feel. I know the feeling all too well of having to live with people who you just can't tolerate anymore. First thing you need to consider is if you really can survive on your own. Its very easy to let emotion drive you to make an impulse decision, but you need to think realistically if moving out will actually create more problems than its worth. Trust me when I tell you this, it will be damn hard as a person who has only graduated high school to make ends meat in this economy. At the end of the day you may need to end up swallowing some pride and just sticking with your current situation until a better one comes along. You should be able to do college without your parents being connected to funds I think, but please don't take my word for that. You'll have to do your own research. Best thing to do is ask someone from the college registrar directly (by phone call if need be).

    The times ahead will really test the periphery of your patience, but remember one thing... never never never give up. I'm not sure exactly what kind of torture you're going through with your family right now, but trust me, living on your own at your stage in life is very difficult. The pain of it may even end up being more intolerable than your current situation. Don't even get me started on getting your own car. The best course of action I think is to play the long game. Don't try to satisfy your short term needs, but instead stick with what you have now, but save for the future. Save every dollar, every quarter, every dime, every nickel, and every penny until you have enough money to make a difference.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Well for moving out, I think the first thing you should do is get a job and save up. Secondly, you should try looking around and asking friends if any of them can take you in as a roommate. Barring that, you could try answering want-ads for roommates, but again, you're probably going to need a job and proof of employment just to show you CAN pay off your share of the rent. Friends however might be more lenient about it.

    If none of that is an option, I've heard of women staying in women's shelters, abuse centers, the Y.M.C.A., hostels, or homeless shelters, but any one of those options are less than ideal, still they ARE options for if you absolutely, positively need to get out.

    The car will be hard to save up for, at first, especially if you are living entirely on your own, independently, still, it's possible, so long as you're not TOO picky, and so long as you're smart on how to buy a car.

    College will be hard to afford too, however, there is a chance you can apply for student loans, or scholarships, or something. Still, that tends to be dependent on things like your grades, and your financial situation, or any number of things. Still there are options.

    Anyway, you do have options.

    Good luck.


    By the way, if you're wondering why nobody else has responded to you yet, it's probably because you went anonymous, and then blocked anonymous answers. This site tends to regard that as "Bad form" or as a "Dick move". So if you want more answers, you might want to drop anonymity.

  • There really is no way to move out unless you have a job, and should not move out unless you have a stable job. Job simply is a must, gotta pay rent, bills, groceries etc. You need to get an approximate idea what's the rent is like where you want to move out. Then save up two months worth of rent. Also try save up $200 for emergencies.

    When you move out and rent a property you always get a lease, you do not rent no matter how cheap it is without a lease. If you know someone knowledgeable about these things you can trust, maybe you can ask them for help. But better option will be to find a roommate, that way it'll be cheaper, safer, you'll be more comfortable.

    Try get a room where there is some sort of transport, car is expensive. It maybe annoying and may take a while coming back and forth from work, but its cheaper, and the only alternative available. Unless you can rely on someone. Also do not trust others with your money.

    While about college, no you're an adult so your parents will have no input. But there might be some problem in regards to funds, because your parents income maybe taken into account. So you're going to need more advise on this regard from someone who is more knowledgeable about these things.

    The best advise I'm going to give you is do not borrow money from others, or banks or anywhere else. Live within your means. Only use what you earn. When you really need to borrow just imagine you will be paying 5x more than you're borrowing.

    If you have any other questions or queries just ask, and I'll try my best.


What Girls Said 1

  • try to get a scholarship or soemthing and work at the same time if that's possible?


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