Three weeks hanging with a girl and she pulls way back. What's up?

I've never done this, so hopefully I get some good advice my first time out. I'm going to give you the details to the point. I'm 31, she's 26 and I'm really into this girl.

Met with a group of friends. She came to my place that night. No sex. She Facebook friended me the next day.

Hung out two more times that week. Stayed over her place once. No Sex. Movies the other night. No sleepover.

She went home to Portland for a week. Spent it with family. We texted the entire time. Shared pictures of what we were doing and talked about a few things we could get together and do when she returned.

She came back on a Monday, invited me out to drinks with her roommate. Invited me back to stay at her place. No sex. I left my watch - she said I would need to come back again because of it.

I invited her to go out Wednesday to hang out. Had drinks, stayed at my place. No Sex. She did say, "we shouldn't have sex yet or we'll get too attached" Had breakfast and walked to work the next day.

Now, here's where it gets weird. She didn't text me or make contact for about two days. I asked her if she was around for the weekend to hang and said she probably wasn't and wanted to stay in for the weekend and be anti-social. No more texts. Told her that I understand that things might be moving fast and I'm not in a rush and want her to feel comfortable taking a step back. And if it wasn't that and she was just not interested, I could handle. Not being dramatic, but keeping lines of communication open and then signed off with have a great weekend.

A day later I got a text - saying she enjoys the time we spend together, but it's a lot and wouldn't mind scaling it back a bit. She started to text me more, but still kind of distant.

I'm not going to ask her to hang out again - the balls in her court. But does anyone out there have any thoughts on what's going through this girls head? Any thoughts on how I should play this out? Even thinking I should just turn down the next offer from her to hang (if that comes). Which sucks because I'm digging this girl. I know she's a younger than me, but she is much more mature than her age, but maybe playing games is still a thing for her.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think maybe she feels that things are moving too fast and so by scaling back on talking to you and seeing you so much she can wrap her mind around things and start taking her time. If she texts you about hanging out I wouldn't turn her down. That wouldn't make any sense since you're so interested in her. There's no point in playing games with her so she can end up with bad feelings for you because of it. If you like her as much as you say you do, you don't need to risk it by turning her down. She'll probably think you've lost interest and you've moved on to someone else.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I notice that you keep mentioning "no sex" every time you hang out. Maybe she sensed that you were wanting to go a little faster sooner than she was comfortable with and that's why she lost some interest.

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  • you kind of expected sex kind of extremely quickly. hang out with friends go back to my place-no sex . wtf. slow down there bunny rabbit. try getting to _know_ _her_ first.

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  • i think she needs you to make more of an effort

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  • i think she got your interest and then she wants you to chas eher the res tof the way.

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What Guys Said 1

  • why don't you ask her out

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