I'm 33, divorced once, my boyfriend of the past 8 months is 40, divorced twice. 2 months ago, he asked me to move into his house with him and I questioned if it was too soon. He said "no, when you know, you know." He even insisted on meeting my parents when they were in town, before he asked me to move in. I moved in two weeks ago, and every day he would say "i'm so happy you're here," "i love waking up next to you," "i love that you're adding your feminine touch to make this our home," etc.. A week after moving in, he tells me he's having second thoughts about living together. He said he's lived by himself for so long that he has his routine, and that he feels like he's walking on eggshells around me. We've never fought, we've never had a disagreement, and both being divorced, we talked about very intimate details regarding lifestyle, debt, household chore responsibilities, etc. before moving in. Since we're older and we dated for a while, I know all of his friends and he knows all of mine. My friends and family are shocked, and even his friends are too! So, what's up? Is there a screw loose somewhere?
Most Helpful Guy
There is. It's called "Habit" and "Freedom". He's playing into his own demons believing that he is setting himself up for the same mistake that he made the first two times when he managed to achieve divorce. He's both nervous about a new resident & regretful about his own actions and the fact that he is "in the same shoes" that he was emotionally all those years ago.
Give him time. He will calm down with a little real-life reassurance that he isn't about to sign up to shoot himself in the foot yet again.1