Most Helpful Girl
I agree with you, re-hashing the past unnecessarily isn't healthy or effective. Sometimes people do that because they feel like the issue was never resolved and never got an answer or closure about it. But if you think that you've talked through it a million times before, then he probably feels a fake sense of safety or confidence by bringing you down and holding things over your head. That's just bad relationship behavior, but you can't fix it for him - he needs to figure out why he wants to be so resentful and work that out on his own. Maybe some time apart would be good for you, it doesn't mean that the relationship is a lost cause but it could help to give you both some perspective.