Hi guys :) so what gives??

Ok I'm so confused lol but I guess we wouldn't be here if we weren't anyways..I started seeing this guy( we are in our later 30's) about a month and a half ago and it was so intense (we work together too) we were so crazy for each other that it's like we went into this weird haze and actually could not remember what day it was... what we did that week, we couldn't even pinpoint when we first kissed or how we even came together, it just seemed there we were joined at the hip, super intense!... lol ya crazy.. anyways I noticed he started pulling away which I know is something guys do sometimes, OK I can deal but he kept pulling away further and further, I'd see him at work and he would be all smiles and happy to see me and always come around during the day and acts like he still really really wants me, he will even say oh lets hang later or oh I will help you do that ect.. but end of day when later comes he always has other plans so after about 2 weeks of this I realized something was terribly wrong so called him on it. Well he admitted that he had started dating someone else... he explained that he felt obligated to date her as he met her before me and told her that when he started dating he would date her..and that was the only reason, I freaked and was so upset, he apologized and said he's so so sorry and he's hurting to, that I mean a lot to him and he still wants to be friends and didn't want it to be like this, that he doesn't want things "messed up between us and he has really strong feelings for me and wants me in his life. as I said I was devastated! so because we work together and I really couldn't be friends with him feeling the way I do about him, I just completely ignored him... wouldn't/couldn't bring myself to look at him as I was "2nd best" in my eyes obviously as he chose someone else over me. I could feel him looking at me and a few times he came to talk to me I would walk away or go stand with others, he would text me and I would tell him to leave me alone but still he persisted in saying he wants to be friends and still wants to hang out. so because I am a suck for him stupid me agreed to be friends as it seemed easier then having him completely gone from my life. So we have been talking and hanging out at work (he comes to see me) and he will sit beside me as close as possible and touch my leg with his, or find a way to stand really close, I will catch him gazing at me when we are just standing there, we will look longingly at me and when he has to go he will make a quick kiss noise (so no one see's), if there is something we got to do as a group he wants to be my partner or make sure I am in his ect... and still will say he wants to help me with whatever I need as he says "always hun" I have your back,whatever you need (I am in the process of moving), but again when it comes to outside of work and I text him to see if he is gonna do...(whatever it is he offered to help me on) he is always doing something else...
he is also dating someone else as I said and I see he has changed his status to "in a relationship and I see pics she has posted on his Facebook. So when them is he still so all over me? a mutual friend says he's really happy with her so if that the case then again why be all on me? a friend of his that is also a body builder offered to train me but then he said that ..."he" would prob not like it and would disown him, again why?
cause he doesn't want to date me but gets jealous if I am friends with other guys? I had a mutual work friend over one day and he told me he was jealous when I told him...again why? he tells me he sometimes listens to my song and thinks about me.he does not usually text me on weekends either so only contact is at work mostly. But if he has a girlfriend and is so happy why all this with me? what gives seriously? you'd think he would like me to move on so he can be on his merry way with the new girl.
oh and just to make sure no one has wrong idea, he does not ask or hint about or have we had sex since this all came down. so it's not for booty call purposes. OK Thanks everybody, I hope someone can shed some light.


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  • It seems that he just like you as a friend. You're like a sister to him.


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