So I'm 17. Single mom did drugs until I was 13 when she was told that if she kept going she would die by the doctors. So she wasn't there for me and my sister when she was on drugs and she really isn't here now. She works from one - 10 so I barely see her since I'm still in high school. She is selfish. Examples: she says she doesn't have any money to get me private lessons which I got a super deal for just $10 an hour for viola lessons. They are usually 80 and up. But she goes shopping for herself at macys whenever she feels like it.
Another thing, she is with a man that used to hit her way back when they were together before I was born. I don't like him. She says he's changed. Anyway, I've been super hungry today because there is absolutely no breakfast food in the house. She doesn't like when we eat dinner food for breakfast. He little boyfriend called and she went out to buy breakfast food that she cooked. She gave me the burnt toast By the way. -_-
Anyway, I'm not happy, its really hard for me to be but my counselor suggested trying to forgive her for everything. How do you forgive someone who just keeps f***in up? When I try to spend time with her, she makes other plans or invites her friends... Wtf? Should I just stop trying?im not affectionate and I don't like sharing my emotions but I'm trying to let her know how I feel. She says we try to make her feel guilty whenever I try to talk to her. Another year and I will be out of here and headed to college. So, thoughts?
Please say why if you answer the poll
- Keep trying to mend the relationshipVote A
- Give up and wait it outVote B
Most Helpful Guy
The "forgiving" part is more about letting go of the hatred or despise so it doesn't consume you. You have a right to be angry and resentful. No one should try to deny you that. Just do not let it swallow you alive.
It is sad you have been exposed to all this at such a young age, but now you know enough about her to realize that you must begin changing your expectations of her. Yes, she should be more involved and more caring, and you have the right to expect that. But if you expect it and she doesn't deliver then you end-up disappointed. Here's a saying I sometimes go by: "Have no expectations and you won't be disappointed."
With that said, keep her in your life. Just do not let her be the cause of anymore let-downs for you.
The fact that you're going to college says much about you. That's a smart move. I do not know what you're going to study, but here are two bits of advice: 1> get a useful (marketable) degree. In other words, get a degree that will actually get you a lucrative (well paying) career., 2> Do not go into debt TOO deeply to it, if at all. A local community college subsidized by the state is as good as any for the purposes of getting an education.
Let me know if you have any questions. Otherwise, good luck to you.0