Most Helpful Guy
Wow...okay...let me see what I can do here.
1. Yes, you deserve better. But not because of the reasons you think you do.
2. Second, don't go around saying you deserve anything. You don't deserve anything. You get what you earn on your own.
3. This guy isn't good for you. He's like a bad Gandalf.
Okay...let me see if I can wade through the rest of this. It sounds to me like you let guys get away with things. Part of that may be daddy issues, but all girls have daddy issues, so I tend to throw that out right away. I think you are just a genuinely good person and you don't realize that people are capable of horrible, awful, selfish things until they prove to you that they are.
Now why guys don't put you as their first choice...there could be a number of reasons for that. Could be you don't put enough effort into the relationship. Could be not enough blowjobs. Could be because you like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Who knows. And really, who cares.
The more important thing to realize here is that someone making you their first choice is exactly that...it's a choice. The guy chooses to make you his first choice...and it seems like you haven't been able to pick up on the fact that guys aren't making you their first choice. But that's okay too, because here's a little secret most girls don't know or acknowledge...a girl is never a guy's first choice. Sex is a guy's first choice, and the girl is always second. That doesn't make all guys awful, that's just how guys are wired. It's nothing personal.
So what does that mean for you...find a guy who likes you for you. A guy who puts some effort toward you. A guy who embraces you and cares about you and asks you questions about your day. Find a guy who isn't typically the guy you go after. Try the quiet guy. Or try the geeky guy. You might be surprised.
I wish you luck and hope you find that person who chooses to make you an important part of their life, not the most important, but one of the important things.