Should women overlook cheating husbands?

If he only cheats once or twice, shouldn't the women(wives) overlook it? Their vows said 'in sickness and health. till death do us part."

So isn't it breaking vows to end your marriage based upon cheating?

I mean, it's only natural for a guy to spread his seed and have a little fun right? men aren't meant to be monogamous

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Most Helpful Guy

  • No way. The idea of being ungrateful and dishonest is an insult to the other partner. Communities and societies are built on families and relationships having faith in each other and trusting each other in their daily lives.

    Lying and cheating destroys families and relationships and fragments societies which makes everyone else suffer.

    It's not natural for a guy to spread his seed and have a little fun. It's natural for Men to have the courage to do what is necessary to bring benefit to people and do what is right and honourable.

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What Guys Said 13

  • I don't think humans are meant to be monagamous but I don't think it's right if you take an oath to monagamy then you should adhere to it, depends on the woman's or man's personal preference if reversed. My mom left my dad for it

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  • People who cheat are prone to practice polyamory all of their lives. Western society shuns the idea, but it's existed for thousands of years in hundred of cultures. I believe that monogamy & polyamory are both natural outcomes based on predisposition, personality, culture & taught values. Men & women with polyamorous tendencies need to be honest with their partners when entering monogamous marriages. Also, polyamorous men who father children need to be sure that they can care for them!

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  • NO!

    they should just leave or divorce them. its better for them and their health, I mean exactly why would anyone wanna be committed to some loser that is bound to cheat? wouldn't overlooking that person 24/7 and over worrying if they are gonna cheat or not make you nervous, and paranoid till the point that you might lose your mind and go insane? so why even bother?

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  • It all depends what is called cheating. Of course having an affair and going to bed is the moat obvious limit but some consider flirting as cheating while others might thing that having a regular lunch-buddy at work is cheating.

    However, You are right about men. We are indeed wired with this evil seed of never being happy with one woman and life is all a teat of how well you resist that.

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  • I disagree, women should be VERY harsh and unforgiving towards men when it comes to cheating.

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  • No and neither should men. Nobody should be around someone long term who treats them like that.

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  • I think continuing a relationship after cheating is unfair to both parties.

    It's neither ideal to have the constant shadow of mistrust loom over you, whether you are cheater genuinely making an effort to change your ways or the person who was cheated on who can never fully trust their partner again.

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  • If he only cheats once or twice the women(wives) should overlook it.

    AND: if she only cheats once or twice the men should overlook it.

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  • Marriage for many is mostly religious. The thing is he is breaking a commandment thus "adultery." So I think that's where it comes into play. But divorce is a legal matter where you can pretty much file for any reason you want.

    But the even the Churches make their own ways to get around the "death do you part" stuff. They have "Annulments" which basically have stricter terms for the marriage. Simple things like refusal of intercourse can be grounds for annulment or lying about identity prior to marriage.

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  • I disagree

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  • Even the Bible allows divorce in the case of adultery. It's a serious issue. If he repents, then I see a chance of saving a relationship, if he doesn't, then he ruined it.

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    • repents to God or apologizes and accepts responsibility to his wife?

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    • Aren't there examples of adultery in the Bible? David committed both adultery and murder, isn't it?

    • Yes, and he repented in both ways: towards God and towards the people of Israel.

      The story was (short version) that David wanted Bathseba, the wife of Urijah. So he sent Urijah, a good soldier, to the front line where he was killed in battle. The prophet Nathan confronted David with what he had done and he repented also in public. Much better would be to repent without being pushed to do so... You find the whole story in 2 Sam 11 if I remember correctly.

  • That's not what "in sickness and in health" means or is referring to...

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    • You missed the "till death do us part"

      I was just on a roll and didn't want to type out the whole thing

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    • So wouldn't marriage counseling/couples therapy be a way of not breaking any more vows(to fight for your marriage)?

      And I initially asked if women should simply overlook the cheating...cause guys are not meant to be monogamous or faithful to one woman

    • If you think it's worth it. But a man not being made for one woman is a crock of s***. There are many conscious men out there that will stay committed to one woman. Any man that doesn't isn't worth being with. Before being married to someone, you best make sure he's a good man. Getting married isn't about being like, "they're hot and I want to be with them forever, let's get married!" There's a bit more to it than that.

  • No, I don't think the should. I know I wouldn't overlook it if my wife or girlfriend cheated on me.

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What Girls Said 12

  • Just because humans aren't meant for something, doesn't mean they can't adapt. We aren't meant for anything we have built over thousands of years: excessive technology, huge governments, buildings etc. But we adapt. Plus, equality is an issue if you start excusing a guy's cheating. Most guys would not just accept it if their women went out and cheated once or twice, so they should get the same treatment. Marriages are not mechanisms to keep you together even if your partner treats you like sh*t.

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  • they should do what they want to do. personally,i wouldn't get married in the first place,and I'd dump a cheater if he didn't ask for permission. everyone has a different relationship,different goal in a relationship and what they get out. if you're married for the sake of marriage or kids,you'll probably stay married. even those who are just in love in a stupid way forgive.

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  • The vows also say 'take this ring as a sign of my love and FIDELITY!' Yes it would be breaking the vows to get divorced, but he has also broken their vows.

    Oh this whole men need to sleep around thing is crap. It's just an excuse for men the have sex with whoever they want. If a man doesn't want to be monogamous he shouldn't get married.

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  • No once a cheater always a cheater. If she forgives him or overlooks him then she herself is giving him the right to treat her like a doormat, humiliate her, walk all over her.

    If she has any self respect she would pack her bags and leave him

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  • that is such a crock,you both vowed and not cheating was part of the promise, when that's broken,there is no marriage, and if a man has to spread his seeds,let go to a freaking field somewhere.Its called maturity,

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  • My vows when I get married will be to not cheat on each other so no, not for me. If he cheats he has already ended the marriage

    I don't agree that it's only natural for a guy to spread his seed and have a little fun because he did choose to marry me. If he wants to "have a little fun" whatever that means, he can do it by not being married to me

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  • F*** that. That's what guys want us to think so that they can feel free to cheat. They're breaking their vows when they cheat. It's never an accident, they know what they're doing and shouldn't be shown any mercy over it.

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  • It depends. If my husband cheated on me, depending on the severity and circumstances I might not divorce him, but that doesn't mean that I wouldn't do my share of dirt too. I believe in balance, and therefore it would only be right if I had my fun too. Women have hormones too, and we are also fickle and emotional. I might get so emotionally hurt that I run to the arms and penis of another man after learning of my hubby's infidelity. As the stronger sex, my husband should be man enough to forgive me and realize that it was only my female weakness in willpower that led me to being unfaithful. He should understand and be OK with that and get over it too.

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  • No not even once

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  • if it's breaking the vow for a woman to leave a man over cheating, then it's also breaking the vow for a man to leave a woman over cheating.

    Men and women take the same vow.

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    • Yes? I never said that's not true

      I'm just focusing on men cheating ATM since so many people defend it

  • I do think relationships require compromise, however I don't ever see myself tolerating infidelity.

    If a person "can't" be monogamous, it's because (s)he lacks self-control and is selfish. Temptation does not go away when we get married, and we get married KNOWING that, we get married promising that we won't give into temptation.

    If someone claims they "can't" be monogamous, they need to find a partner that is okay with that. Or they should just not marry.

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  • Unfortunately, I think this is probably true. The price of a relationship/marriage is giving up things that you want (fidelity, domestic help, sexual attraction, friendship) for that one thing (commitment).

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    • So they would have a non committed commitment lol.

    • Fidelity and commitment aren't exactly the same.

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