Girlfriend's friends are in the way! Help!

Okay, my current girlfriend and I had been together for a year an a half, before we broke up. We were both at different schools, and only saw each other at most once a week, and for some reason her friends decided we shouldn't be together, so they pressured her constantly about leaving.

This isn't completely why we broke up, but when we argued or had small disagreements, it made it a lot harder to get out of, when she would always have these thoughts in the back of her head. Eventually she split and broke up with me in a "heat of the moment" argument.

We didn't see each other for about 8 months, but spoke occasionally to catch up and things. I was okay on my own, but I had never stopped loving her, the times we spent together in person (though there weren't many) were amazing. So, 8 months down the line, we decide to meet up, I saw everything I had ever loved in her that day, we were both different from being alone, but in a good way.

I think we have learnt from past mistakes, we are both a lot more independant of each other now, but still have a very close bond. She asked me to be with her when we met up, she said she regrets everything, and after all the time we've spent apart she still can't think of anyone but me. She said she was pressured into it, and didn't really know what she was doing until it was too late. I ofcourse said yes.

But here is the problem, her friends are also coming to my school (well, only 2-3 of them are a real problem). And they told her exactly this "I will lose all respect for you if you get back with him". She is really worried about losing her friends, because she said they "helped her take her mind off things" (I bet they did!smh).

What can I do to help ease her mind off things? I guess I can't choose her friends but I really don't think they should get involved in our relationship, because they have no idea what we are like when we are together normally, and they only get told the bad things when she's upset.


Most Helpful Guy

  • well it's very probabematic if she is so greatly influenced by her friends. it would concern me taht she isn't good at making decisions on her own.

    why do you think that suggest that she should break up with you?

    it seems to me that most women do this is they think the relationship is bad for the friend. it would be very concerning and selfish is they had no good reason for suggesting she break up with you

    • We used to spend a lot more time together before we moved off to different schools, the distance was too much for us so we used to get into disagreements all the time over her wanting to spend day X with me, and me wanting to spend day Y with her. When she needed advice on these little arguments she would go to her friends, and ofcourse because we were upset with each other she would exaggerate the story, this was pretty much the only time she mentioned me to her friends.

    • Show All
    • She isn't that great at making her decisions, and she is influenced by people greatly. I'm sure the only thing she is sure about is that she loves me, but doesn't really want ANYTHING to go wrong (can't blame her but something has to turn sour by the end of this). Literally, when I'm with her in person, my vocal cords are aching from all the laughter and good times, the problems only occur when we're away and her friends have influence.

    • gotcha. you're right and I remember being in dorms with girls when a friend my get off the phone crying after being on with their boyfriend and the girls just trying to protect the friend say, "oh he is so not good enough for you" "you deserve better". just tell your girlfriend that you are doing your best. that this ldr thing is hard for both of us but you love her and what to do everything you can to make things as good as possible. you'll have bad days and good days but the love doesn't change

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What Girls Said 1

  • Tell her that if they were her real friends they would want her to be happy and not force her to do somthing that she doesn't wanna do. Her friends may even be jealous to see her happy and wanna mess it up for her


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