My ex has been trying to contact me and I want to say hello back, but my boyfriend would freak out. Should I?

This ex was my best friend throughout high school (granted, we were dating), and our break up was clean. No hard feelings from either side. Just circumstances in our lives changed, I was moving to a different state, he wanted a "typical" male college experience (which I get, what's a 21-year-old boy to do). We still talked after we broke up, but I got into a relationship a few months later. Since this guy was jealous of my ex, I made the decision to not talk to my ex anymore (gosh, that sounds horrible). But about a year ago my ex tried to contact me and I ignored it. Then 2 days he tried to contact me again. I do want to say hello, but my boyfriend would flip his lid. What should I do?
Updates:
Oh, I guess I should mention that that relationship lasted for 3 years.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I would maybe respond to the ex, but only after talking to the boyfriend about the whole situation first. As long as you explain how close you and your ex were (in a friendship-type way, of course), your boyfriend should be cool with it. Hear him out if he has any concerns, but also try to convince him that he seriously has nothing to worry about. Make it clear to your boyfriend (and your ex) that you only want to be your ex's friend again, and that you would stop talking to your ex if he ever tries to flirt with you. Your boyfriend shouldn't have a reason to feel like you're hiding anything, so be really open about the whole thing.

    With all that being said, if you think that talking to your ex could possibly bring back old feelings, which honestly is bound to happen, then it's probably not the best idea to talk to him while you are in a relationship. If you were to catch feelings again, you would be creating a really messy situation that would only lead to someone getting hurt, which I'm sure you don't want.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Do what you want. Just don't bitch at your boyfriend if he wants to talk to one of his ex's.

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  • oooo I smell drama...

    The ex contacted you a YEAR ago and you're still hung up on wanting to contact him?

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What Girls Said 1

  • Your boyfriend should have more confidence in you, himself and the relationship than to get jealous of you merely speaking to your ex. You said the break up was amicable and that y'all had been best friends before. I think it's big of him to try to put the past behind him and move forward in acting normal and cordial with you. If it goes beyond that, you'll have to set the boundaries (including friendship if YOU are not comfortable with it).

    At the same time, it may not be worth all the drama to even engage in it. But I wouldn't just ignore the ex, just explain to him the situation and he should understand and back off. I think being ignored is just rude.

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