Bf just broke up with me and we have a baby together, any ideas?


My boyfriend and father of my baby broke up with me a few days ago. The reason why, he says is because he feels like we don't love each other and he's been battling anxiety, depression, insomnia, alcoholism and drug issues the past several months because of his job. he's a chef so he works 12-15 hours a day and hardly has time to see us. I agree that we put our relationship on the back burner because we put our daughter first and his work makes it difficult to even have a relationship. I've tried to convince him to quit his job and get help even if that means we won't have much, his life will be so much better. He says he wants to work til the end of the year which is in 3 more months then quit because we planned to move overseas in January as a family. I keep telling him he needs to quit now and work out his issues but he keeps putting it off. Now he just wants to break up and I don't know what I'm supposed to do. especially because we have a baby together. I love him very much and believe the reason he's breaking up because he's over stressed. He always texts me to ask how we are doing and I just say were OK. Should I just ignore his texts? I don't know how to cope knowing I am a single parent just in a blink of an eye. I feel so sick. I know he's got issues to deal with himself but to break up our family.. I really didn't see this coming

i was told he's getting help for his issues now. should I send words of support to him or just leave him alone

I just want my family back. Somebody please help me


Most Helpful Girl

  • Get a lawyer and make sure he pays for his child. You can't make someone love you. If he doesn't want the responsibility of a family there's nothing you can do. I don't know if you should talk to him if he ran away then he obviously wants to be alone. And I wouldn't be so concerned about the job as I would about the drug and alcohol abuse. He really shouldn't be around a child with those problems. You should go to a woman's support group and learn to live on your own and take care of your child.


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What Guys Said 2

  • You cannot control other people , be stable and look after your daughter . As for coping as a single parent , I have 3 kids the youngest is 5 ,I am a single parent as the mother is in the mental heath system .

  • Being a single parent is incredibly difficult. No child should grow up without the love and support of both parents, however the struggles of the father over a prolonged period of time can have an incredibly adverse effect on the child. If he is unstable, then his pressence could be poisionous to the overall family. You can offer him support and love, but only he can choose to help himself and then his family. The child must always come first & should never suffer due to imperfect parents. Never confuse staying together for the sake of a child to automatically be what is best. I grew up the child of a single parent. It tore my mother apart when my father left, but being raised in a home without love would have been bad for her and me. Women are unfortunately put in situations like this far too often, but I believe in the strength of a mother. A strength men are not capable of. Best wishes.

    • Thankyou so much for your comment. I'm trying my hardest to stay strong for my baby. And your words really helped me think things through. I truly appreciate it thankyou again

What Girls Said 1

  • You have to stop making this about HIM,...ex: he is stressed , he is this, he is that, what about YOU?

    are you sure he is really at work all those hours? do you have proof? this guy sounds like a huge excuse cry baby. He has hardly no time to see u? Is money more important than his family? I doubt that, I think there is something deeper going on. You need to get to the bottom if it,I know you love him but he is not showing you the same love back, he is totally taking you for granite so you need to disappear stop being so supportive , ;look how far that has gotten you. You deserve the LOVE you want, with or without him, focus on your baby.


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