4 Years & no "I love you"


I am trying to if there is some correlation with saying I love you too fast.

Ex. Julie and her boyfriend went out for 3 months, then say I love you. They broke up 2 months later.

John and his girlfriend went out for a year, then said I love you. They broke up a year later.

I have told my boyfriend a year in the relationship, but he still hasn't said it back. We are now 4 years in. I do wish he would say it, but he has had many issues before with girls so I am not pressuring him. I am happy with him so I can wait for it ;)

And, this is the longest relationship I have been in. So, I think there may possibly be a correlation.

Anyway, enough about me! What about you? I am really curious what the average time is =)

Also, if you want to get into this topic, answer this to for me! Thanks!

1)Length it took

2)Would you wait as long as me? or longer?

3)Do you see a correlation?

  • 1-3 months
    Vote A
  • 3-6 months
    Vote B
  • 6-12 months
    Vote C
  • 1-2 years
    Vote D
  • OMG I feel you! 3-4 years
    Vote E
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy


Most Helpful Girl

  • My ex-boyfriend said I love you within a week, and said it every single time we hung out, every half hour, constantly. It was beginning to lose its substances when a word is used so often. I said it within a year, but I meant it more in a friend way.

    My current boyfriend (2nd one), I can tell that he doesn't say those words often at all. He is the completely opposite and cannot express himself and he doesn't show any emotion. Ithink I'm okay with that though:)It COULDD be a problem though since I'm not very emotional and expressive as well :/

    I think I could wait as long as you but I would be somewhat sad that something is holding him back so much from saying that. I would feel hurt that I'm not worthy enough for him to attempt to change his mindset. They are just words. :)

    Good luck with yours :)

    • I agree with you. Don't get me wrong, I am sad. But, I feel in my heart that his actions show he loves me. If you knew his complete situation, you would probably understand more. And, at times, it is still hard. I think he will say it soon though! lol fingers crossed! xx

    • He will :)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Rushing things is never good. But he shoulda said it a long time ago.

    • I should add, I'm not like most people. The girls I said it to I was friends with first (though I told them sooner I had feelings and whatnot) and ya. So I already knew them well before we started a relationship and I said "I love you" in a relatively early time to the romantic relationship, but it was well into our friendship.

    • Show All
    • Pity. Though I never really thought her decision to have sex for her first time the way she did was great, it was her choice. Oh well *shrugs* good if she's doing well.

    • aw yeah I agree. but I just tried to be a friend.

  • I express my feelings too quick. If you have been together 4 years then it's working. Don't mess a good thing up by pushing him to say a few words. Philosophically, love is a place that most of us get to go at sometime or another. Some stay in this place a long time. Others step in and out quickly. The words "I Love You" are just that only words. The words are empty of any substance. It is in his behavior that is much more important than his words and also how you feel when you are close to him.

    • the question isn't really about how I feel with him. it was about how you feel about saying I love you too fast. but okay. thanks.

What Girls Said 2

  • I have been with my boyfriend 13 months he still has not said it but his actions show me he loves me and I feel loved so I am staying patient.

    • wow this is really old! lol And, that really sucks! Some guys just aren't ready for it. I was with him for 4 years and finally he told me he loved me. lol so yeah! But, we have the BEST relationship ever! I couldn't be happier. The waiting was worth it! x

    • Show All
    • He sounds like my boyfriend lol. My boyfriend says people let themselves fall to easily and say those words when its not sincere they just say it out of habit or because they are afraid if they dont say it soon enough they will walk away. It sucks but im still waiting. I hope my boyfriend does love me and is just not ready to say it. My boyfriend has told me that he has never been in love before and when he said it to his ex it was because she kept pressuring him after a few months of being together.

    • haha yeah pretty much like mine. My boyfriend had one girl he loved and that was it... and she ended up cheated on him a LOT. he took her back so many times but she never changed. It was sad and really hurt him. She even had a kid by some other dude and my boyfriend helped raise her as if she was his own. Women can be bitches.. So, I think this was one of his issues... She never really loved him and he doesn't like to fall in love... and when he does.. he doesn't want to accept it so easily. He has only told 2 girls he loved them. His ex (though he hates now) and me. I think your boyfriend probably does love you, just wants to make it special like mine did :) though it was weird and funny, he first told me when we stopped talking for like a month because of something he did.

  • I told my boyfriend a year into the relationship. He told me 6 months in. It is now 6 years later. We're still together.

    • thank you for the input!

      I am very happy for you :)