She rejected me, but now she wants me? Does this actually happen?

We were really close friends for a few years until I developed feelings. She was beginning to act real flirty too. However when I brought it up she told me she only saw me as a friend, I asked about her behavior and she became very defensive. We didn't talk for months after that. When we did start talking again it was strictly as friends. That went on for a month or so until we met up one night for a drink. She was all over me that night. When asked if we were a couple she even said yes and would stroke my leg or hold my hand. She brought up what happened a few months back and apologized. Said she just couldn't see me as anything but a friend at the time. Then she hugged me and said she loved me. We went back to my place that night, one thing led to another, and we ended up sleeping together.

I suppose her actions speak clearly but I thought the same way the first time through. I can't help but to question her actions. In my experience things like this usually don't happen, and if they do it's because the girl is feeling lonely and needs an outlet but that's it. Any opinions?


Most Helpful Guy

  • It could be that she was just rejected by someone and looked to you for reassurance that she was attractive..;that DOES happen. And you reassured her pretty thoroughly

    And girls DO use 'friend' guys to make 'real' boyfriends jealous, that DOES happen as well. Even to the point of sleeping with them.

    I'd also be a little suspicious of her motives here. As you say, usually once you're rejected, girls will never reconsider their decision.

    And she out of the blue jumped into bed the first time she voiced any romantic feelings for you. Also, not the usual or 'normal' behavior. Usually such a big decision, and such a big change in her feelings, would be something that would happen gradually over time...

    Not that there are strict rules about such things, of course. All I can say is, watch your back...


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What Girls Said 3

  • It does happen. I developed feelings for a guy after he liked me first. Feelings do change.

    But it could also be that she only wants you now because she's lonely or likes the challenge. It depends on the girl, really. I guess you'd have to follow your instincts and see how it plays out.

  • Alot of girls want guys that they can't have. I used to be that girl that was quick to call someone my brother or just my friend , and later regret that I said that...I think that you should bring this up to her and tell her how confused you are and ask her if her feelings for you real or just a in the moment thing.

  • She might have not of noticed she was flirting because I do tht sometimes thy think I like them but I don't then you realize after thinking…tht it was fun with tht person and realizing how cute they really were once there gone or how good of a person thy are. That's happened to me before except for the sleeping part or if you ignored her she realized she likes your attenetion because by ignoring a girl after liking them and treating them good will kinda make them go crazy over you once your gone and that's from my personal expirence. my question is based kinda on this so if you could please answer it please (:


What Guys Said 1

  • this could be closure as many people seek it to avoid loneliness or feeling depressed. suggest you strongly caution yourself & question her motives. it could be she genuinely likes you & realized what a great guy she missed out on or she using you as a ladder to bring her out of the dump yard.


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