I pissed her off a while ago, is it OK to talk to her again?

I had a class with this girl and on the last day of class she was flirty and friendly, so I asked her for her number. She obliged, we had the class for 3 months and didn't even know each others names. Shortly after we began to text each other like crazy, and one night she came over and we had a great time/hooked up. She let me know that we wouldn't be able to do it that often, but she would definitely like to do it again. I thought cool, so I let her have her space.We continued to talk and our conversations got deeper. But one night I called her up drunk late, and she didn't answer. She was a little upset the next day. I told her I was drunk and she was OK, well... I did it again a few nights later... I was on spring break and partying almost every night. And this time she got very upset and told me the reason why she wasn't up at all hours of the night was because she had a child to take care of. During this conversation I apparently said the wrong things and we stopped talking after that... I made a few lame attempts to talk to her again to no avail that was 6 months ago. And since then we have seen each other fairly often at school but we Haven't spoken.

The other day she she accepted my friend request on FB I sent her months ago after seeing me dressed very nicely at school... I had a job interview. I found that very odd, being that I sent her it a while back and she just left it idling in her friend request file.

I want to clear the air with her, how should I do that? When we were talking I was very smooth up until I drunk dialed her... twice. I wasn't intimidated, but now I am more nervous as ever. When I pass by her at school I actually break a sweat... yeah I am that scared of her. I am embarrassed to be honest. How should I approach this and what do I say? Will she ever come to me first to break the tension or will I have to do this? I don't think she is afraid of me like I am of her... I don't want to message her, I want to do it in person.


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  • You'll have to approach her: It was you who hurt her. In your place, my first instinct would be to message her, as you could put "My apology" as the subject line and make sure you were contrite, proofread it, etc.. It's also safer to believe she'll be okay with a message from you than you coming up to her and talking, as if she wanted no messages from you she probably wouldn't have accepted the friend request.

    If you really want to do it in person, you can't really lead with your apology: You'll have to make small talk for a while, and if she allows you to talk long enough, you can then talk about how sorry you are for having drunk dialed her repeatedly.

    She's probably pretty much forgiven you, given that she did accept the friend request...but whether she wants to talk to you face to face now, who knows? Be prepared for possible rejection-- really, either way, but more so in person.

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