My mind was completely blown last night when my ex was finally honest with me. We have been broken up for 3 weeks and this week I've been really busy with my assignments from college so he slipped from my mind and just when I thouhht I was moving on he contacted me. Not to get back together of course just to see if I would agree to have sex with him without attachment. And I was so angry at not only the pure nerve of him even asking me that but while we were together he never really wanted sex and for the longest time I thought it was me. It wasn't it was because he had weird fantasies about me that he never told me about for 6 months we were together. He said sex was too easy and available during the relationship, what the hell? So I told him he was a cheeky so and so and to leave me alone but he just wouldn't stop begging me to allow him to lick me out. He said he didn't want me to do things to him he wanted to do it to me cos he likes the thought of him being used by me. He was adamant that he didn't want a relationship again with me which kind of stung but I accept this and don't want him back either. I'm just wondering why oh why guys only want me when they can't have me? He said he loved the fact I'm no longer making it easy for him and I said I'm not doing it to turn you on I'm doing it cos I think your disgusting and have issues. I think he's left me alone now but guranteed he will text in a few weeks to see if I want to again. How the hell did I not see this in him for 6 months? How the hell did I nearly fall for such a sex pest? He said had visions of me grabbing his head really rough and burying it between my legs. Why did he never say this when we were going out instead of leaving me so frustrated?
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Clearly he can't be warm and communicative with women he's with; he has emotional blockages, obviously, or fixatons of various kinds. It would take a lot of therapy to get to the root of it all.
But when you're just an OBJECT to him, a stranger, not someone he's emotionally involved with, THEN he can verbalize all the fantasies he had about you. In fact, he probably didn't even HAVE such fantasies while you were together.
Reality wasn't satisfying tohim. You know, some guys hire hookers even though they have a healthy sex life, just so they can try out fantasies they couldn't with their loving partner.1