Go for long-distance or wait it out? How should I approach this?

Hi there,

Been thinking about something for a while and thought I'd just ask for some advice. I know in the end it will be up to me and this girl to decide what happens, but I was curious to get some input.

Anyway, I'm a senior at college, about to finish my second to last semester. I met a girl back home this summer, just by chance and we started hanging out. I'm from Europe, so since I knew I was going back for my last year at college in the US, I wasn't exactly planning on seeing someone this seriously, but when do you ever plan something like that right? Anyway, we really hit it off and kept seeing each other the whole summer (about 3 months), and it was great. Things got pretty serious but then, as we had known, the day came where I was leaving for college again.

We were really into each other already at this point, and agreed that had I not been going back to the US for another year, we would keep seeing each other with the intention of becoming a couple relatively soon. Obviously however, the fact that I was leaving sort of complicated things. I wasn't really sure what to suggest since I really had never been in this situation before, but we agreed that we would stay in touch as much as possible and then "see what happened", wait until I got back and take it from there. In other words, we never made anything official.

Now, about 3 months later, we have been talking (mostly over texting) about every day/every other day and talked on the phone or Skype about 3-4 times a month. I really feel that although we have been apart, it has gotten more serious since I left as we both seem to have realized how much we miss each other. We have talked about it several times and both admitted that we want to be with each other, and that we both really don't have any interest in seeing other people (Note: I haven't, but I'm not sure whether or not she has, frankly I know we are not official and I don't really want to know). Anyway, Christmas break is coming up and I will be going home for about 3 weeks, and obviously we will be seeing each other as much as possible then.

Now, I know that we'll have to feel it out once I get back and we are hanging out, and obviously talk about it, but I'm wondering what you think I should suggest as far as moving forward? I'm going back for another semester, but after that I will be coming home. I personally want us to become officially together before I leave again after Christmas, but maybe this would be weird? I don't know. We just haven't seen each other in a while and only dated for a few months last summer. Is it too early for a long-distance relationship? At the same time, if we both feel the way we seem to I don't really see any reason for us not to just go for it. After all, if everything feels just as great during Christmas we are half way there the way I see it. Also, I'm not sure how I'd feel about going back for another semester without "us" not really officially existing.

Would love any input! Thanks


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What Girls Said 1

  • i have answered many many questions on here saying I don't believe in LDR.

    your situation seem ripe to move forward. discuss with her, she seem like she is also very into you.

    since you only have one more semester to go. ask her to be your girlfriend.

    you two set a foundation during the summer. tried out the "long distance"...she may like a title...

    go for it.


    • Thanks for your response!

      Things are still feeling really good, and I can't wait to see her in a few weeks. My plan is to hang out with her for a bit when I'm back home, and then just talk it all over with her. Either way, it will have been 6 months since we started seeing each other and even though I've been away I feel like its time to make up our minds about what's going on and where this is going!

      Thanks again!

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