How to tell someone you can't?

How to tell someone you can't and won't meet him or see him anymore for coffee or lunch ? Been meeting this ex colleague on and off for coffee or lunch but I developed a crush and feelings for him even though he has a girlfriend. Think of him a lot.

I have removed him from FB and he hadn't noticed or ask me why.

Should I just cut him off cold ? Should I have the decency and tell him and embarrass both of us potentially?


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I don't know why you'd just remove him like that. Don't worry though; he'll eventually notice and hate you or think that you don't like him soon enough.

    • And, for the record, he very well could have noticed, but, since your removing him implies that you don't want to speak to (or have anything to do with) him, he just hasn't asked why. That's what we guys, or at least I, generally do after a woman removes me from Facebook, even if I did like her.

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    • I'd say that he's noticed, but, since you've shown him in person that you want to be friends, he's let it slide. So why'd you keep meeting him and why do you, after more than a year, suddenly want to stop meeting up with him? I don't mean this as insult (because everyone is like this at times, especially when it comes to the opposite sex), but you're being very inconsistent and irrational.

    • Yes you have got it right there - I know I am inconsistent and irrational. Knowing he has a girlfriend, I still have feelings for him. Removing him from FB was the first step but still haven't got rid of the feelings . So stop meeting him for casual coffee or lunch, and quit all contact is what I thought I should do.

What Girls Said 1

  • He hasn't notices lol don't complicate things and make it awkward. If he wants to talk or find out what's up, he will make it happen. If you deleted him from your life than why would you try to contact him? weird.

    • I removed him a year ago but in the meantime we continued to keep in touch and meet up. I suspect he doesn't use FB much as there are no activities there.

    • Then what is the problem here? I'm confused.