I am 20 years old (female) and haven't had a boyfriend in almost 2 years and at first it wasn't a big deal I would go out talk to guys talk to exes and just enjoy being single. But recently I have really been wanting a guy to be with but I just don't have anyone that I know that I like and likes me back as well, so I've been trying to meet new guys. I got this app where you can meet local guys and talk to them so I have been, and I realized a patern with them which is that guy over 20 usually have some form of a tie down and it is really hard for me to accept. I met 2 guys close to my age (21 and 22) both of which have kids and baby mommas who are still very involved and I met 2 older guys (27 and 28) who had literally been married for years and have kids as well but are divorced. These are just the guys I met but out of the guys I talked to most of them had similar stories or were under 18. I figured maybe this is just the app? But at my university people my age (generally) are already in LT relationships, getting engaged, some even have kids, or are married. At the very least most of my friends have boyfriends/girlfriends whom they consider "serious". I don't know whether to just accept that I am at an age where I'm not gonna find a guy who isn't divorced with kids or just leaving an 8year relationship so still loves his ex etc. or keep trying to find a guy who's in my same boat. I'm not perfect either but I don't have kids or exes that I'm still involved with. That's the least I ask for...a fresh start for me and my future guy. Is that too much to ask for?
Most Helpful Guy
You have legitimate deal breakers. That's what it is. Single parents have it very rough in the dating field and legitimately so. I have talked to a crapload of single moms and their situations make me run for the hills. Most of them still keep in touch with their exes and fight all the time. That's the most common situation and I'd have to sit and listen to their custody battles and how far they were going to mess the other one up in court. Plus single parents have a ridiculously hard time living on their own. They're either really poor or like most people, stuck living with their parents. Don't even get me started on the alcoholic single parents.
Divorced is another tricky one. Sometimes it's smooth, other times you could be meeting someone who is stuck in the paperwork phase and is fighting over possessions, who has the kids, and so on.
Basically you're stuck in the same boat a lot of people are in. People who have pasts with irreplaceable scars or they're still hung up on a past loved one.
Sad news is, it gets more common as you get older.
Good news is, all you gotta do is meet one good guy and you don't have to meet the ridiculous amount of trash out there.0