Ex relationship- should I be worried?

Long text, but please bear with me. Me and my boyfriend have been together for over a year now and it’s been going great. He always tells me loves me, takes care of me, pushes me to study, even talks about our future together like it's a certain thing. We talk everyday and meet very often, he told me not only once that I was the best thing that has happened to him and everything seems right since he met me. He hasn't done anything to make me question my trust, but recently I've been really paranoid about something. About a month ago, I was at his place and he told me to check his Facebook messages about a link and I saw a conversation with a girl which involved me a little. He said he was bored and when she asked him why isn't he out with me, he said that I had exams coming. So this chick tells him something like "is she a nerd who only wants straight A-s?" and he explained that I needed good grades for a scholarship. Anyway, it wasn't a big deal, but I felt that she was being mean and we didn't know each other, and I told my boyfriend that I was kinda pissed that a random person would say stuff like that and he wouldn’t react in any way. He explained that this girl was a little blunt, but it’s really nothing to worry about. I was teasing him about this a day later, but I wasn’t mad anymore, and he told me he doesn’t talk to her anymore because he doesn’t want me to feel unconfortable. I felt he was overreacting so it seemed kinda strange to me, but he said that the relationship with her was long overdue anyway. I kinda forgot about this episode, but recently I was staying at his place and he left me his laptop until he got back from work. Now, I shamelessly admit that I went through his messages because I was curious and… that’s when I found out that the chick was his ex, with whom he had a 2-3 years relationship. He told me about his relationships, but not with great detail because I really didn’t ask anyway. The conversations were friendly, they talked only briefly about their past, nothing for me to worry about except one thing, when he said he made pizza and she was like – „You cooked? That bitch!” or something like that. He never said anything about me, only that he had a psychotic break before he met me and now he’s happy and doing well. He didn’t lie about breaking things off with her, he told her that she changed and he was done for a long time, and they have nothing to discuss anymore. Now, I feel bad about reading his private messages. My rational side says everything’s fine, he never hides his pms or anything and he clearly told her that things are over. But on the other hand, I can’t shake the feeling that he still has some feelings even though the relationship ended a few years ago and I felt a little betrayed when he didn’t put her in her place… but maybe that’s what I get for invading his privacy, this feeling of insecurity. Anyway, thanks for reading and I would appreciate some opinions. Cheers!


Most Helpful Girl

  • OMG that was long! lol...

    Anyway, no need to worry. He shouldn't be talking to that girl for a few reasons--She is DEFINITELY NOT OVER HIM. Signs of jealousy from HER were all over that text you wrote. Her being bitchy about you means she is jealous. YES he should have put her in her place when she got bitchy...but he is a guy...and most guys don't like confrontation. We all have to deal with that...you are not the only one lol

    I am sure he has no more feelings for her. WHY? Cuz, if he did, he would be with her. Period. He is with you. Just from reading the text you wrote, you are far more attractive than that other girl. Inside and out. You have many more good traits. He is over her. Now, if I were you, I would thank him for not talking to her anymore. And, if he goes and talks to her again...then, I would be a little upset.

    But, for now...he is doing the right thing...he stopped talking to her on his own. He is very much into you and not into her. :-)

    Don't worry :-)

    • Thank you so much! Weird how a few words from a stranger can make your day better ^^ Yeah, well, I told him I don't wanna be controlling and he has the freedom to talk to whomever he likes, but if it was his decision, I am happy he made it ^^

    • :] you're welcome :] ignore the other comment. people can be ignorant but stay happy! And be happy! xoxo

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What Girls Said 2

  • well I don't think I would trust him or even stay with him.

  • Pssshhhhh, drop him.


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