*TEXT EXCHANGE BELOW*
He found an excuse not to see me tonight. We had spent 3 evenings together last week. He broke up with his ex of 3 years before this school semester. My last relationship (2 years) ended around the same time, so it's important to note that we're both afraid of commitment right now. Here's our text exchange, I'd really like advice on this.
Me: It's OK but you know, you could tell me that you don't want to see me anymore be honest
Him: For real I think you're a really nice girl and I enjoy cuddling with you! I don't want us to see each other too often as first cause it accelerates things easily. As you said, the clock to make a move is ticking. You were right
Me: It makes sense but there's a difference between slowing things down because it's going too fast and neglecting things out of interest loss. I don't know which side I'm at and I think I've been clear enough about not being interested in becoming your booty call. If that's what you're looking for, I'd prefer you tell me
Him: It's not really what I'm looking for but I think we're not looking for the same things... I personally enjoyed the evenings with you but I wouldn't want to develop something serious and with you it'll develop if I see you too much
Him: When I'm alone with you, I feel you really nicely.. I just find that things are heading the same direction as my exes, aka we text a lot, I like being with you. But I don't want to head this direction right now, so I don't want to give you false hope. How did you feel what what was going on?
Me: I like you and you seem like a nice guy, yeah things were going too fast for my taste but I liked spending time with you. I don't want to rush into a serious relationship right now either. The thing is that I'm stuggling to figure out if your problem is that it's evolving too quick, or that you just don't want a relationship at all eventually. I don't mind taking my time, but if you already know you're closed to the idea, to me it makes a difference.
Him: OK. Yeah I'm pretty closed to the idea. It's not that I don't like you but ''eventually'' would be in pretty long, let's say. We get along well but we're two different styles of people according to me. Would you still be interested in seeing me again ou would you rather not?
Me: I'm not sure, to be honest. It's a bit blurry to me too, what I want. I don't know where it'd lead us or what you'd be looking for if you kept seeing me
Him: Yeah I don't know either what I'm looking for with you.. I like to take the time to think. I'll sleep on it, as I often do.
Most Helpful Girl
To start, I think it's great that you told him straight up what you want.That's an awesome skill that a lot of girls (myself included!) don't have. However, he has said more than once that while he has enjoyed spending time with you, he doesn't see it going anywhere. I think that should be your take home here. He did say he would think about it, but he may have felt a little bit pressured into that statement. Because you've made your point clear, I think you should wait and see if he comes back to you in the near future. If not, you should move on. Getting over people is never fun, but the more you drag something out, the more difficult it is. You don't want to be with someone you have to push into liking you. Hope this helped!
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