Does my ex secretly want me back? Is he denying it? Or is he just being an a-hole?

There's 3 things he's constantly doing that make me wonder if he's trying to get at me on purpose.

1) He still talks so much crap about me, saying that I’m a liar and that it’s my fault the break up happened, etc. I understand that he’s emotionally invested in some way, but how do I turn this around and make him think positive thoughts about me? Plus, why would he care so much to even be mentioning my name?

2) At first, my ex said that is wouldn’t be a good idea if we talked. I got upset over this, but respected his wishes and let him think I was doing okay without him. After 4 weeks I called him asking politely if I could have my stuff back, nothing more (He’s also said to people that I’m meeting up with him to get my stuff back, which was never discussed. It’s been 3 weeks since that phone call, and I’m still waiting. Maybe holding on to my things so I have to keep asking him?). Since then I haven’t contacted him. He’s tried to message me on Skype saying that he’s heard I want to talk, but I don’t. I didn’t reply, and he deleted me! Was this retaliation for me not responding? I think he thinks by deleting me it would make me want to talk to him, thinking I’d get pissed off or something. Should I keep blocking him out, or start being warmer to him?

3) He hasn’t exactly found someone yet, but he calls other girls things like “hun” and “darl”, and will make an effort to hug them and shit in front of me. What the heck is this for? He even talks to and hugs this one girl that tried to split us up at one point. Is this desperacy for attention from females or is he trying to get the attention from me, thinking this will make me jealous? It just makes him look pathetic.

The thing is, I do still want my ex back somewhat. We were together for a year and it was going really well, we’d settled down and got to really understand each other, but then a rumour got made up and he believed it, called me every name under the sun, dumped me over the phone etc. Agh. He’s never even let me explain this BS rumour. He thinks I’m the worst person in the World. How do I show him I’m not? How do I show him that I’m a really content, confident woman that has so much love and affection to offer? He was great in the relationship, but he hates it when there's a problem, even it if's miniscule. He'll run away from it in hope that is disappears, he didn't protect me at a time I needed it most.


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What Guys Said 2

  • it does sound as if he still is attached to you. Try sending him aletter explaining that he is hurting you by his gossipping and rumor spreading, and that you still love him and want to meet to explain everything face to face.

    That puts the ball I his court; he either has to meet with you or decide to end things once and for all.

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    • I offered him to talk and he said he didn't want to, so I respected him and left him alone. Now, he wants to talk to me and I'm not so bothered anymore. Do you think he's doing these things to try and get a reaction out of me? I wouldn't mi d explaining everything, but I don't want to be shot down again.

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    • It's hard to explain the full situation on here, is there any way I can message you? You seem like an understanding person and I could really use a bit of help right now.

    • Sure, message me on Gag, you'll have to get to be a friend...

  • It doesn't sound like you two are compatible...It doesn't sound like he has any desire to get back together with you. Let him go and find another.

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