I recently just got out of a relationship of 14 years. We dated throughout HS and college. It was an amicable split. Our families are friends and we both love each others' families. I truly care about him only as a friend, and he's always been respectful of the breakup.
Soon after, I began seeing someone and he absolutely wants me to have nothing to do with my ex. He doesn't understand we can be friends and he doesn't get our families care about each other and it would be almost impossible to completely sever ties with him. He's very serious and wants to settle down, and I do see that happening in the future. I think he doesn't understand my feelings since he's dated around a lot in his past and can't imagine a breakup with an ex being amicable and truly caring for them to move on and be happy. We get along but this is a never ending fight, and it saddens me. I don't know what to do. Am I bring unreasonable for asking him to understand? Or is he right? Any advice would be appreciated...
Most Helpful Girl
I feel like 14 years is such a long time to be with someone, that when you split it's for very good reason - because it must have been a very big decision. So thinking of it that way, I think he should try to be a bit more understanding. You guys know it just didn't work out, but you're still such a big part of each others' lives.
But on your boyfriend's end, I can see why it might make him insecure. "The ex" is not a happy topic in any relationship.
Have you had them meet each other? Spend time together? That's really my only suggestion for trying to ease his worries. If that doesn't work, I'd say the best you can do if you really want your relationship to last, is to really cut back on communication with the ex. I know you can't totally cut him out of your life, but maybe reigning it in for a while will help your boyfriend relax.1