What should I do about this situation? My ex girlfriend has proven to be so wrong

So my ex and I were going through a rough part of our relationship. WE had previously broken up for a few days. In those few days, I contacted her ex boyfriend, who used to be my good friend. Well, she found out that I talked to him and she told me she didn't want me talking to him. I then lied to her, and told her that HE was the one that contacted me first...

Well, I lied to not make her angry or mad at me. Simple as that. I didn't want to ruin our relationship which was already on thin ice. SO a few weeks later, she questions me on what really happened that night. Well, at first I lie, but then I come clean. I tell her that I did contact him first, and I told her everything. Well, not everything.. I still lied and said that I contacted him the night before, and then he contacted me back the next day...

Turns out, he sends her our conversation as a screenshot, so she has proof of my lies the whole time. Meanwhile she's questioning me and everything and I tell her, "stop guilting me, you know the truth". THis is what REALLLY pissed her off... I also accused her of talking to her ex bf.. and she says that I'm turning it all on her, when that's what she's mad at me for. She gets pissed off, so she tells me she never wants to talk to me again, and I say really mean and hurtful things to her.. Out of anger, because that's just what I do.. I go crazy...

Well, turns out that she was talking to him... And I found proof of it all.. Unfortunately, I have some friends that know them, and could verify all the lies she spit at me. Meanwhile, she's calling me a LIAR for lying about the contacting him. She's telling me I'm a scumbag, when in fact she's going behind my back while we are dating, and TALKING to her EX BF...

Unbelievable.. This is the girl that told me forever and ever, and that she loves me so much. She tells me that any girl would be lucky to have me, and that I AM TOO GOOD FOR HER. She's told me that she doesn't deserve me... I think she says that because she knows what she's doing is wrong, and that I don't deserve that. I deserve somebody who is not going to do whatever she did...

I did love her. and I did care about her and still doo... I think there is a great girl inside there somewhere, and I told her I'm willing to stick by her side and help her get through it all.

well. we were friends and always were there for eachother. It wasn't until earlier in the year when we started talking again alot. We started hanging out and eventually decided to be FWB.(friends with benefits)... well, that didn't last too long as we both fell for eachother and started dating..

so, yeah, it wasn't PLANNED.. I wasn't pursuing her knowingly wanting a relationship. That's why when it all just happened, it felt good and felt right.
and I talked to her Ex/my old friend because to talk to him about what he went through when she broke up with him... She ended up finding out we talked, because she was talking to him at the same time and telling me not to talk to him for this reason. She always told me she hated him and would never talk to him. So yeah, I'm over it now, but just giving some more insight on the situation...


Most Helpful Guy

  • Why does it matter whos wrong and whose right?

    First off, you should have never have texted buddy. Who cares what you had to find out, or what you had to do. I could understand if you were him and you started texting him aka the "roles" were switched, but you shouldn't have done that. aka if you were the ex, and wanted to know what's going on.

    Secondly, it sounds like your literally in a highschool relationship, aka everyone is in your buisiness pure drama all around, her ex is texting her. Buddy for all you know, people could be lieing to you, she could be telling the truth, or it could be opposite. Who knows?! Honestly its a big mess now.

    First rule of thumb, never engage your friends in your "personal relationship". NO MATTER WHAT. People get jealous, envious etc etc, and do w.e they can to see you guys fall. And they may not even have a reason for it. They just wanna break you guys up for the fun of it. Don't you get that?

    Another thing, you say your not inlove with her anymore. Okay cool, so after all this drama, and all this shit, you still wanna fix everything with her? wtf is wrong with you? knowing what she has done, and how much you guys have cut each other up. What are you trying to fix? Things don't really get better after this point I'm sorry to say. Plus, how can you trust her again, how can she trust you again? You lied, she lied, moving forward it will just be a. your lieing she's lieing game.

    Yea and the forever and ever crap, ever girl says that. Not to burst your bubble. A little pointer, its the ones that don't say that, that stay around forever. The ones that talk the talk, can't walk the walk. Which is what you have. Honestly, it sounds like you have a materialistic bitch on your hands. I would be thankful this came up now, then later one.

    Another thing, don't date your ex's gfs huh... Honestly, can you not find another girl from another circle of friends?...

    I wouldn't fix anything, I would actually be counting my blessings for the fact that you can walk away from this, and not have any baggage connected to her moving forward into your life. Aka, kids. Cause trust me, once she has those, she actually owns your wallet.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Why did you talk to her ex/your ex friend?

    Did you talk to him as YOUR friend or HER ex? This is what makes the difference here and why she would be upset with you.

    How did she find out you talked to him? Did you start with some "He said ________" or did she find out by talking to him herself? Also, you were broken up during this time so it's fine she talked to him or even banged him... You weren't together.

    I talk to my exes all the time. Despite not wanting a romantic relationship with them I care about them as people and are friends with them.

    She was questioning you despite knowing the truth because she wanted to see if you'd lie to her about it or tell the truth. That's how you find out if someone is trustworthy, ask questions you know the answers to...


What Guys Said 2

  • Going to tell you something I wish I knew a long ass time ago.

    Don't try to be with someone who doesn't even understand themselves. They're nothing but a spiraling vortex of madness that will drag you down with them.

    Also, forever and ever doesn't mean jack shit. Cause the reality is, she's probably going to tell the the next guy "forever and ever."

    Welcome to love.

    Welcome to life.

    Welcome to reality.

    People try to share lives with other people before they try to understand themselves, and chaos ensues.

  • Oh and one more thing. WHO CARES WHOS WRONG AND WHOSE RIGHT.

    Why are you making this the battles of the egos?! When are you gonna grow up?

    You should just be happy that you don't have any baggage with this girl moving forward. Cause she sounds like a lump.

    • Your not over it.

      FWB never goes far. You both fell for bullshit you guys made up in your heads. You never actually fell for her, cause falling with your FWB is never true. You just fell for the physical connection you guys both had. That's all. Cause she could get her rocks off and u, and you got your rocks off on her. You knew you were doing wrong, aka helping her "mend" through her phase with her ex, and she knew she was doing wrong talking to you.

    • Show All
    • BE HAPPY YOU DONT HAVE BAGGAGE WITH HER. END OF STORY. You will find someone better.

      And I'm sorry to sound mean and harsh in this. But I feel like you need a couple of slaps of reality to your face to bring you back to normal.

    • Moving forward. Don't date your ex's gfs. Unless they dated like 10 years ago. And don't try to get FWB with someone. IT NEVER WORKS. You guys were both just vulnerable, and decided to have sex, and thought that's what love is. When it isn't. Trying to help someone heal, and banging them and saying you love them is not love. Sorry.