Am I being too sensitive - boyfriend doesn't seem to care

We had a fire alarm in our flat block this morning and my boyfriend and I got up to leave (obviously!) . But my boyfriend didn't wait for me. He just turned the lights off and left the flat while I was still putting my shoes on. I got out through the back but it's a bit of a walk round to the front where he was. I was 5 min after him and he didn't seem to notice...or care. This kind of thing (him not seeming to care) has happened numerous times since we've been together, e.g when I'm ill he asks me to stay with my mum so he doesn't catch anything , but he says I'm oversensitive and he "obviously" loves me. I don't think it's obvious. I can't get out of my head that if there had been a real fire, he wouldn't have waited for me. We both thought there might be a small fire upstairs at the time. Am I overreacting though?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It seems like he is a little callous towards you. Reminds me of how my father treats my mom, its not that he does not care he just has a really hard time showing it... my dad gets stiff when you give him a hug and only say I love you if you say it first. Not only that, but he will think that everything is fine and is obvious to how you feel. I suggest you sit down and talk to him about how you feel communication is the most important part of a relationship. See if he changes after your chat! good luck!

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What Guys Said 2

  • I think you feel he needs to show how he feels about you a little more often, do something romantic or be more worried about you than he really needs to be when something happens. You just want him to show how he'd be lost without you. It's normal for a woman to want these things and it's normal for a man not to give them very often.

    Try to keep in mind that he's expressing his love to you in his own way, try to notice the way he does express his feelings for you and appreciate them for what they are. That being said, him doing something romantic or dramatic for you every now and then is certainly not a bad thing, so if you want him to do those things, encourage them by showing how much you appreciate it when he does something like that.

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  • He seems cold. I'm don't know maybe its just me but if my significant other left me by myself while there was a fire alarm going off in the building and just was like "See Ya!" and couldn't even wait for me to put on my shoes we would either have a serious discussion or his butt would be out the door depending on the level of the relationship (Real fire or not). By his actions I would say he is extremely selfish that or he doesn't think about what he is doing, I am like that a little sort of "foggy headed" I never think to do little stuff like help someone carry groceries inside or open the door for them,etc because I honestly just don't think to its not that I am rude it just doesn't appear to me that I should do that for them, So that might be the case but...who the hell leaves there girl inside a building while a fire alarm is going off? what if there was real fire and he did that? I think you need to talk to him.

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What Girls Said 2

  • It's one thing if you're taking your time leaving the building when the alarms go off but it's not so nice if you're going at a reasonable pace and he's sprinting out the door.

    As for asking you to stay at your moms when you're sick, that is completely unfair. If he does't want to be around you then he should be the one to leave.

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  • i personally think a guy that really loves you would actually want to take care of you if you are sick & want to protect you as well as he can. really now you have to stay with when your sick just so he doesn't get sick? that's selfish! what happens if you guys moved away together where would you live if you got sick. & I don't think its just an excuse of not wanting to catch anything, he might just feel that you are too much of a burden when you are sick. then what happens if he is sick? you guys need to talk asap!

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