Its been 30 days without contacting to my ex what should I do?

he has a girlfriend but he told me he still love me so I decided to told him to let me move on.. he answered OK no problem take the time that I need I shld contact him if I'm ready as he said..
Updates:
I follow some advice of my friends to used NO CONTACT RULE FOR 30 days... but I have not heard him for a while.. what should I do, should I contact him after one month?he has a girlfriend but he told me he still love me so I decided to told him to let me move on.. he answered OK no problem take the time that I need I shld contact him if I'm ready as he said

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Most Helpful Guy

  • what caligirl2003 said down below - follow your heart. Seriously.

    While all these people make reasonable suggestions to just "move on" and do nothing, how satisfying is that? When has doing nothing got you anything? If you want something or want to express something important, then you should do it. Never suppress something so strong inside you (assuming it's unharmful, of course!).

    I recently have been in a similar situation and I basically ignored the majority of the advice given to me and just followed my heart and had a nice long convo with my ex. And I feel MUCH better about it. MUCH better. And you know what? Nothing bad happened, I learned a lot, expressed a lot, grew a little bit, still keep in touch with my ex, etc.

    It's very therapeutic, even if it doesn't yield the results you want.

    If you DO contact him, all I can suggest is try to sound as level-headed as possible, or at least don't show any resentment or desperation. Cry over the phone, sure, but don't beg or anything. Say you love him, yeah, but also say you understand and respect his perspective. etc etc.

    That's all I can suggest - follow your heart, do what you think is best for you. But don't come off as insensitive and desperate.

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    • hey danny, just want you to know I'm okay now getting stronger, just want to say thank you for all ,it's been awhile since you walked away

      I'm way past cryingOver you finding someone else I know your happy now together with your girlfriend, I don't want to bother you anymore. goodluck, all the best.. what do you think to this email, should I send this to him? or I look desperate and needy?

    • no that doesn't sound desperate or needy at all. I think a lot of people nowadays confuse "expressing emotions" with "being desperate and needy". That email is fine, you're just saying how you feel and leaving it up to him. You're showing signs of mental and emotional maturity in that msg.

      "desperate and needy" would be more like saying you'll die w/o him or threaten to do something dangerous because you can't have him, etc.

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What Guys Said 7

  • i haven't heard from my ex for a similar length of time either , I pretty much gave up any hope of hearing from her anytime soon . some people in these sort of situations just aren't interested in keeping in touch , they often like to break all contact and move on

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  • You're ready for what? Another rejection?

    He's got a new girlfriend, let him be. If he says he still loves you it's very unfair from his part, but people are like that.

    I've been doing the No Contact rule for 3 weeks now since my ex broke up with me. She isn't dating or seeing anyone else at the moment which does give me a slight opening, but I'm not keeping my hopes up for her.

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  • If I were you I would just ignore him and find someone else

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  • Find another guy! There are lots of options out there!

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  • He has a girlfriend, and tried letting you down the easy way. Being desperate and needy are undesirable traits.

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  • If you're over him, don't text him and ignore him completely.

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  • 30 days is a long time and he likely could have had time to move on in 30 days.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Text him and let him know you miss him. He would probably text you back. Follow your heart not advice alk the time

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    • while possibly a contradiction ("my advice is to not follow advice"), that last part is actually spot on. Follow your heart, QA. Sure some of the advice is reasonable, but really, all it is is just telling you to do nothing. And since when did doing nothing get you anything? caligirl2003 is right, follow your heart.

    • hey danny, just want you to know I'm okay now getting stronger, just want to say thank you for all ,it's been awhile since you walked away

      I'm way past cryingOver you finding someone else I know your happy now together with your girlfriend, I don't want to bother you anymore. goodluck, all the best.. what do you think to this email, should I send this to him? or I look desperate and needy?

    • Well some of it I might leave out, I remember texting my ex it had been two months since we talked and I was sad like you. I text similar & got a response. I told him I want to say thank you I realize now the breakup was a good idea. I didn't bring up the other girlfriend. I didn't say I don't want to bother you anymore cause truth is you prob want to talk to him. Be careful with your words. Or you could just say, "I'm sorry," You should get a response like I did. We started talking again.

  • Move on..before the new year comes...take this time to reminiscence, cry and all that other stuff but after 11:59 Dec 2013...He NEVER existed. he has a girlfriend just move one...Its better for you, you don't want to start off a year stuck on him.

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  • Don't waste your time on someone who is not wasting their time on you. Move on.

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  • Ok your ex has a girlfriend. He may love you but actions speak louder than words. He is with someone else not you. The no contact rule is not going to magically make him want you. He may not know what he wants or maybe he wants to see if he still has a chance with you just in case things go wrong with an ex. I do believe a person can love their ex but not in a way they use to. It does not mean they want you romantically anymore. I think you should never contact him anymore. Don't put yourself in a position to be second choice. That is what you are doing now. It does not matter whether you were in a relationship before her or not. Right now he is not with you.

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    • :( I saw there photos together they went to australia can't help but cry...

    • Show All
    • Traveling means nothing in my opinion. I knew a guy who tried to talk to me while he had a girlfriend. He still is with the same girl. He took her to las vegas, italy and carribean cruise. He post pictures of scantily clad women on his Facebook page

    • they are both succesful,

  • move ON

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