Why does she refuse to let us be happy, but won't let us break up?

Okay, I'l make this as efficient and short as I can

Ive known her since I was 16 and her 14( I am now 23 and her 21).

we hung out a few times occasionally until 3-4 years ago when we began hanging out daily. She wanted to go out, and I had some bad habits/behaviors which I did not want her to have to endure or be hurt by such as cheating, lying, and just being a selfish person in general. she knew very well how I was anyways, and I told her many times why I wasn't ready to go out. Internally I knew she brought out feelings I'd never had for someone before. Where I used to not think twice about how my ways would impact people and I'd lie and deny no matter what, with her I was very honest and open attempted to convey my conflict to her. The conflict was that I wanted to remain friends because it would protect us while I went through my changes, so it wouldn't hinder us or harm her if I messed it up. I had always been that way and was ready to change, but I knew that changes take time and that I would be ready overnight. At the time, most of my life revolved around being a player/going to parties and changing it changed my whole life because it left giant blanks in my free time. During the changhe me and her hung out very often still, and were close. I repeatedly made sure she was aware that we were friends and she'd say yes, but then later on she'd break down and say it felt like we were together. Of course there were people saying I was just using her for sex because we werent together and my history, which was NOT true. I would respond to those accusations by saying the physical aspect should stop for us until we are together. She hated it and refused. fast forward 2 years, so a year ago...

we had ups and downs but remained in the same position throughout except for two brief times we went out. Then one day she gets with another guy, and I just KNEW something changed and when I saw her she gave an ultimatum: Be with her or lose her. She was tired of waiting. I said okay and chose to be with her. That weekend she goes over to his place, I find out because he tried to fight me(who fights anymore? lol) later on.

So, since that day I said "Yes, I am ready", things have been flipped. early in 2013 she cheated with my best friend(two of them), and a couple other guys. She lied about me to her family, friends, my friends, and effectively made anyone who didn't know me hate me. Then she came back after and since has been very cruel, negative, hurtful, rude, and twists our past by saying I cheated on her years ago(when we were NOT together) and that's why she did what she did with the guys, and she says because I cheated we are "ruined". I have worked incredibly hard to help us grow positively and be a happy couple. She refuses any positive effort though, but will fight with me on a whim. When I try to break up and go she doesn't want that though, so I am confused and can't make sense of it. So, girls, What do you think she is thinking?...


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  • symbiotic realationshs suck. id forget her.


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