Why don't the men I like like me back??!

I just found out that the guy I had a huge crush on got into a relationship with a girl that is f***ing ugly and looks like a w**re. He is a very handsome, stylish man, and she just looks so tacky. It's driving me crazy. I look way better than her.. I'm taller, skinnier, waaaaayyyy more stylish and overall prettier. Why on earth would he go for her and not me? One would assume that someone like him would at least go for someone who would look good next to him, or at least with the same interests (he works as a stylist at a big retail chain)! I mean seriously the two of them together is just a wrong picture.. And I know I must seem very shallow because I am talking only about looks, but I am not.. I have a pretty decent personality and I'm talented at many things, but naturally the first thing you notice about someone is their looks. I'm so devastated I am actually considering killing myself as this is not the first time this has happened. The men I like seem to never like me back and go for women that are - by all means - less than me! It is like I don"t even exist! Is it me? Is there something wrong with me or is that men naturally go for the lowest of the low of women? I seriously doubt I can take another disappointment or have my heart broken again. Serious answers only please as I don't need to be more upset.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Weeeeell could be a couple of things:

    1. I wouldn't date a girl(even a hot one) who literally thinks she's better than other people. If she's kidding about it it's fine, but literally believing it to be true is kinda repulsive. Maybe he's the same way.

    2. He may not think you're interested in him. You guys never talked, he doesn't know you and you may come across as conceited/intimidating.

    3. Maybe you give off a creepy vibe. Wanting to commit suicide over some dude you didn't even ever talk to sounds kinda needy/projecting/weird to me especially if you're mid thirties.

    Here is some advice:

    1- Try taking more initiative. When you really want something it's worth putting yourself out there for it even if it's not something you'd normally do.

    2- Try holding back your thoughts about guys until you actually get to know them. That'll avoid you falling in love with an impression (which can be completely wrong and lead to disappointment)

    3- Try letting go of what other people do with their lives. Don't compare yourself to others it's not productive.

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What Guys Said 7

  • First of all don't kill yourself over this you are giving the men in your life way to much power. I battle with the same problem of giving girls I like to much power as well and have thought of hurting myself for the very same reasons but this is not the answer. You seem to have a lot of confidence and you say you are attractive so your problem probably has something to do with your approach or perhaps you are intimidating to talk to. Your approach should be flirty and set up plenty of opportunities for your crush to ask you to do something together. Come off as easy going and open to meeting new people! This is applicable to you possibly coming off as intimidating. Although ideally guys are supposed to have the attitude that we can approach any women at any time, most guys feel intimidated by a particular type of women. These women are incredibly attractive and have to deal with the problem that guys simply don't ask them out because they are afraid of rejection! To become more approachable smile a lot and always treat people the same (Treat everybody well). Try to keep conversations fun and comical. Of course when you are talking to your crush flirt a lot! I am an expert at being approachable so if you have any questions feel free to friend me and we can talk!

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  • For god's Sake.

    Notice your own reactions: Sometimes our most limiting beliefs and attitudes live below the surface until they are provoked. When emotional triggers kick in or we find ourselves labeling or stereotyping others, it's time to check what's going on inside us to determine whether our responses help or get in the way.

    Review your standards, you might feel like you deserve a 10, but you might only be attractive enough to get a 6-7.

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  • You like someone, you take initiative. Doesn't matter if you're a girl. It's life. You didn't make the first move so he found someone he liked or someone else make the first move. Cut your losses, learn from this and move on.

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  • Personally I wouldn't date the type of person who thinks two people shouldn't be together mostly based off how they look together. Keep elevating yourself above other women who obviously have something that these guys go for or else they wouldn't keep going for them.

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  • Hmmm maybe just relax don't think of people that way for your own sake. Not everyone you like is going to like you back. I know it sucks arse watching someone you like go off with someone else. This is a small problem in the grand scale of things. Look how big the universe is and then look at your problem. Considering the many options there are and finding the way we want is not working should be no surprise whatsoever.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Seriously, you need some counseling. It is not the end of the world that he is with another girl. And yes, it is very shallow of you to talk about your looks only. Besides, have you even tried to talk to him? Maybe he is intimidated by you or he just isn't aware of your existence. Also, do not go around assuming that you are better than so many people. That is probably the main reason guys won't date you! They want to feel equal to you, not less than.

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    • No have not talked to him.. I don't like initiating conversations or making first moves generally, but he is very well aware of my existence.

  • Most guys are good at sensing a girl with a narcissistic personality and a superiority complex. That's why. Pull your head out of your ass. Maybe she's hmm... Something called HUMBLE. Or how about NICE.

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  • If you haven't even talked to him he's not going to notice or consider dating you. Being aware of someone and getting to know them personally are two different things. If you look as good as you say you do, men can be turned off by the idea of hot girls being stuck up bitches they don't have a chance with, which makes it even more important to talk and let him know you're interested!

    keep in mind looks aren't the only thing men go for. Maybe there's something in this other girls personality you don't know about that attracted him. Hot girls date unattractive dudes all the time, so why not?

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  • Your jealousy is very immature

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  • men are hard to understand,this is one thing I understand about them.

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    • There's a saying that goes around...don't try to understand the opposite sex, because they probably don't even understand themselves

    • true.lets just make love*

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