How can guys move on quick when they break up. But girls take time.

So blah blah blah we were together for a year then he realized that he wanted some girl who smoked weed and drank. Unlike me. I was his first girl. But he told me he already has someone after a month. Come on I'm here just taking my time crying. Working on me. Remember ing the good timea. Enjoying myself. While he has another chick. It hurts alot

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Most Helpful Guy

  • What Reynier said is kinda right. Though some more factors to throw in is how long you two were dating, how you broke up and why you broke up.

    I had a girlfriend who asked me out. Thing is we didn't really talk much (so I never really bonded to her), she never really answered me and she never really seemed like she wanted me. It was weird that she asked me out seeming really interested and then would immediately grow distant but things happen. We broke up 4 months into it and I was kinda over it quickly because I didn't feel bonded to her. I ended up dating someone else a week or two later, not to hurt my ex but so I could just move forward with my life.

    The thing is guys don't put as much emotional investment into a girl like girls generally do to guys. The main reason for this is to not appear needy and over eager because it's unattractive to a lot of girls. It also helps them protect themselves from being hurt later. Some guys may miss you or be hurting and will start dating someone else to help them move on and this generally doesn't last. He may just try to forget everything or repress feelings or he may have genuinely cared about you but is just able to move on quickly. Don't worry about him too much. I'd actually suggest avoiding him as much as possible because it would help you move on.

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    • He wanted a drug user because he was a drug user. Smoked weed very single day and did it before work too

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    • Ugh I know thank you. I honestly believe he cared alot. But yeah I'm glad I don't do stupid weed. Do you know how I can get my shirt back?. It's been a while

    • You could ask him for your shirt back. Just say like you forgot it and that you would like it back. Be honest and polite with him. If he doesn't give it back you might just have to accept not getting your shirt back either sorry.

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What Guys Said 5

  • he wasn't emotionally invested as much as you were, that's it really. you had ideas of having a perfect life amd how awesome he was going to be yadda yadda then he stomped on your dreams. just realize it for what it is, cry your heart out if it helps but move on

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    • I'm sorry but I don't agree on that. He seemed very involved the whole time up until the end

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    • well there you have it, date guys your age

    • Yeah even one year younger is too much lol

  • It's not a guy thing per se. It means simply that he didn't put as much value in your relationship as you did. It's a common "strategy" guys use, because it's a way to protect yourself from the pain you're feeling right now (which is why he is able to move on so quickly), but what they don't realize is that it's that very emotional risk which you dared to take that gives a relationship meaning to begin with. For you, the relationship mattered a whole lot more than for him, and that's a good thing.

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  • To him the relationship was over way before the breakup.

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  • I've found the opposite to be the case, that women get over men really quickly while I always struggle to get over them.

    Generally though I think the person who does the breaking up only appears to get over the breakup easier because they've usually already been thinking of breaking up for weeks, so they've had time to process it, and line up a replacement, and so on.

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  • We don't.. we just hide it in when we're in public. But that's when we're dumped.

    If you're the one doing the break up, it's quite easy to move on since you're breaking up with that person because you no longer care all that much about her/him.

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