Do you tell your parents everything?

Do you guys and girls tell your mom or dad everything going on about your boyfriend or girlfriend?. Lets say you breakup & had a fight do you tell them that?. I heard most people don't want to talk about their relationship with parents especially if there are problems. I'm very close with my mom & we talk about everything & sex.etc. I'm a virgin so it doesn't matter. But in the past I really loved my ex boyfriend and we were having problems during the breakup and there was confusion. I wasn't fair but neither was he. So yea he was acting disrespectful and ignoring me a lot when I tried working things out. So everytime I tried to move on he was either playing me or really missed me and wanted me back. My parents were so angry and they didn't want me to date him again,etc because he will hurt me again. But now I feel like they are trying to control me because couples have fights but don't want to give up. it should be up to you when to give up and not parents right?. So now from learning how much hard time they gave me too from worrying too much I'm not going to share so many details with them anymore not even mom. What if me & my future boyfriend are going through a hard time? they will judge me and say breakup with him for good,move on,etc, don't get back with him and you want too . that's not fair. I'm 25 years old. yes I live with them but trust me I felt like running from home a lot before from the stress. they saw the pain I was in. They could have said its up to you what you decide. would you tell your mom everything?lol.

thank you all in advance.
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Let's put it this way. My parents didn't know I had a boyfriend in high school until another parent came up to my mom at a football game and said, "It's a shame Alex and Peter broke up, isn't it?" They had no idea.

    My parents know about my relationship with my current boyfriend but not about what happens in it. It's really none of their business. My mom has tried to pry and I don't give her an inch. She's like, "So, you and Jason have been together for a while...is it serious?" And I always say, "Well, I suppose since it has lasted this long..."

    And then she'll be like, "Have you talked about the future?"

    And I respond with, "It's kind of a one day at a time thing."

    But in reality we've basically planned out our entire life.

    So no. I don't tell them about my relationship. My dad and I have a don't ask don't tell kind of relationship (even though my boyfriend and I don't do anything bad) and my mom never really played a nurturing mother kind of role in my childhood so we never had that bond. She never was a person I felt I could go to with problems and not be judged so I don't go to her with them now as an adult.

    That's not to say I'm not close with my parents. We just don't discuss relationships. We all know that we'd all get equally uncomfortable if we sat in a circle and let the feelings come out haha.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Nope. I imagine them to pretty stupid so I don't feel like I'm missing out on stellar advice. Keep in mind that it's easy for your parents to say, "He's not the one, he's not worth it." because everybody you date except for one is gonna fail in some way eventually. So they're always right kind of. But that's not the point. The point is you have to figure out how long. How long do you date this guy?

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  • My parents aren't even aware of most of the relationships I've had. I tend to compartmentalize relationships. I keep family, friends, and dating all separate from one another.

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  • Um, it could be that they are just looking out for you. You should cut them a little slack because nobody wants to see their daughter hurt.

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  • They're dead but I never told them everything: when I was very young it would have cost me a lot of punitions when I was an adolescent it would have frightened them.

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  • I think it would be kind of odd telling them everything... And awkward as well. Just fill them in on the basics I guess

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  • I'm talking to my father about almost everything bothering me.

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  • HA! hell no

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  • based on how my parents react to my brother and sister's partners I'll want to keep them as far away from any girlfriend I have.

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What Girls Said 16

  • not everything. but I tell my mom a lot and then she tells my dad so he knows too. if it was up to me, my dad wouldn't know much at all about boy stuff because he thinks I'm too emotional and dramatic and ridiculous which pisses me off but whatever. I usually talk to my mom after the fact rather than during or before. like, if I have a date or start seeing someone I will tell my mom afterward. I'm not sure why. I think it's for that very reason - I want to make the decisions on my own and I would much rather her feel bad for me that I made a bad choice than have her watch me make the bad choice.

    as for your situation, it sounds like this guy does a lot of pushing and pulling, stringing you along, so that he stays in control so your mom may have a point. this guy doesn't sound very good for you and honestly it doesn't sound like a healthy relationship. your mom is just looking out for you - it sounds like this guy has put you through enough shit and you really shouldn't let him do that to you.

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    • thank you, that was my ex boyfriend. I stopped talking to him since April 2013 but we brokeup in 2012. yes he was really weird.

  • Hey cutiepie22,

    I'm not really close to my mom and I really envy you that, but I constantly go to my dad for advice. I respect and trust his opinion, he's been through it all and often provides a different perspective (often a more realistic perspective) than my friends. That being said I only talk to him when I actually need advice. If you need to vent your frustrations, talk to your friends. That's what they are there for:)

    Also it's important to sit and really think for yourself, figure out what your feeling and why. If you feel disrespected or abandoned by your boyfriend, ask yourself would you behave this way towards him? If this was happening to a friend what advice would you give her? Is this the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Is he worth the pain? etc.

    Take some time away from the situation if you need it, but recognize that although their opinion may have upset you, your parents were not the ones causing the problem in the first place.

    Really I think it comes down to this: If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question.

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  • I myself have never really had the relationship with my parents to tell them everything. I mostly just tell them the basics and leave it at that. I really think it depends on the relationship every person has with their own parents and go with what makes you feel comfortable.

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  • I tell my parents everything for the most part, besides sexual things (obviously haha). My mom does know I lost my virginity though, but that was an interesting share because she told me some things about herself as well haha.

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  • No, I tell them enough info but NOT all. They can trust me to do the right decisions in life and don't need to be on me 100%. I do have a great bond with both so we can talk about anything if I need to go to them. :)

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  • I used to, but they got more judgmental over the years. So I no longer feel comfortable telling them everything. Now I only tell them what they absolutely need to know.

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  • Parents can be very protective, and judgmental when it comes to boys for their daughters. Especially if you're their only daughter. It's just a natural thing parents do. Better them being a bit overprotective than parents who don't take care of you, lets you drink their booze when you were 8, etc.

    There are certain areas of my life that I don't tell my parents. My problems, my beliefs in religion, and my love life. I just tell them the basics and that's it. I don't even tell them when I have a date or something. They only know the big picture of my life, and some details that I don't feel that important but would make them feel like they are up-to-date with my life.

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  • I tell my parent what I think they need to know. I tell them positive things about my fiance and my relationship with him. I do not tell them about every disagreement unless it concerns them in some way (absolutely none of their business). I also don't tell them about my sex life - they know I have sex but they don't need to know the details! My parents love him like their own son and I don't want them to have a negative opinion about him, especially since he is going to be my husband.

    I think it's important to take note of what your parents and siblings think of your partner, though. They have an objective viewpoint and they can see things that you can't.

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  • Yes I did with my last relationship. I told her about his family and other small things about him. If she asked me what was wrong I would say "Oh nothing, Adam is just getting on my nerves right now." I never told her anything that would make her change her opinion about him though. As far as sexual things or love? She would ask if we really cared for each other and I would always say yes. When I decided to get on birth control I causally walked into her room not really knowing what to expect and I said "do you care if I get on BC?" She laughed and said "for what? ". I said "for all of its benefits..." and she said "yeah, OK at least you're being smart about things". She also saw a hickey on my neck and said "what did I tell you about getting those?".

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  • No. I don't tell them everything cause ill never hear the end of it.

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  • I use to tell my parents everything, but sadly they have both passed away

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  • HELL NO!

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  • Kinda hard to do now that they're gone.

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  • Of course not. They must still think I've never had a boyfriend or go on dates...

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  • I used to tell my mom everything, but the same thing happened to me and I had to stop. After I told her about a bad argument my ex and I had, she wanted me to stop dating him. She stayed in my business, and inevitably broke us up for good. She put such a strain on our relationship that he nor I could handle it anymore. I love my mom because she only wants the best for me, but I have learned my lesson and I will no longer be telling her EVERYTHING, especially what happens in my relationships.

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    • thats exactly how I feel now. yes my ex boyfriend wasn't fair to me and kept playing mind games, ignoring me each time I try to talk to him, putting other girls in my face. if he sees me moving on then 4 mths later he tries to talk to me lol. before that he wouldn't talk for 3 mths so that's 7 mths altogether. he couldn't say a simple thanks. sorry to hear about your situation. I'm also going to try not to tell my mom much about the guy ill date in the future. if I have to vent ill go to my friends.

    • Yeah, I completely know what you mean. You just have to explain to your parents that you love them and you know they want the best for you, but you're an adult already and you need to live your life for you, not for them. Parents are usually right when they tell us someone is no good for us, but part of growing up is making our own choices, and at times mistakes. Thanks hun and I hope everything goes well for you!

    • thanks, good luck to you too!

  • Generally yes. I keep them very included.

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